The portal about the repair of the bathroom. Useful advice

Early stages of emotional development. Emotional stages of experiencing loss

The researchers found that there are several stages of the escalation of crises in adoptive families. Understanding this dynamics can help adopters in a timely manner to identify problems arising in relations between them and an adopted child and seek help in stabilizing these relations.

Stage 1. "Honeymoon"

Immediately after moving the child in an adoptive family, adoptive believers tend to have pleasure and pleasant excitement. Family members are full of hope and relieve a happy future. This stage can continue for several months, and if there are no serious crises in the family, and several years.

Stage 2. Reducing the level of satisfaction

The atmosphere in the family begins to change. Adopters begin to feel tensions in their relationship with the child. What has previously desired, begins to annoy and disappoint. Adoptives continue to hope that it is "temporary." At this stage, adopters often do not share with any of their concerns, believing that everything will be "soon."

Stage 3. Search for a problem in the child

Relationships with the child continue to deteriorate. All "bad" in the behavior of the child - from children's hysterics to serious misconduct - becomes unbearable. Relationships deteriorate. The child feels tensions in adopters, which only enhances his anxiety and leads to a further deterioration of behavior. Adopters perceive it as a rejection from the child and inadequately react even to insignificant problems.

Problem in the child

The fact that you used to die, begins to annoy the adopters become tense and irritable.

The child feels tension and anxiety and begins to behave worse.

Adopters seem that the child rejects them, and they begin to respond inadequately to minor misdeed.

Stage 4. Public Manifestation

Problems soon begin to affect the public life of the family. The child begins to behave not only at home, but also "in humans" - in the presence of relatives and friends, in school, etc.

Disappointment and embarrassment often make adoptive parents look for support in the surrounding listened list of the child's misdemeanor. Goodness can give them advice who confirm the opinion of adoptive parents that the problem lies in the child, and subconsciously push them to distance from the child.

Stage 5. Swivel

The state of affairs in the family continues to deteriorate. Sooner or later, there is any incident with the participation of the child (the child steals something, begins to behave in a sexy painted manner, walking classes at school), which adoptive parents have long been expected - and which overflows the bowl of their patience. According to adoptive parents, the child thereby "rides Rubikon", after which there is no hope for reconciliation. The family continues to live under the same roof, but there is an insurmountable wall of pain, anger and rejection between adoptive parents and a child, which deprives all the hopes for a happy future. No one has peaceful forces to return to healthy family life. In most families, the emphasis starting at this stage does not yet become the cause of the official cessation of adoption, but it often leads to irreconcilable conflicts and makes it impossible to normal relations and restoring proximity. In some cases, the refusal of adopters from the child becomes inevitable.

Stage 6. Establishment of the deadline or the presentation of an ultimatum

In some cases, the culmination of problems becomes a family crisis. Advancers impose a child an ultimatum or establish the deadline to which the situation should significantly improve, or the child must leave the family. Often, their requirements are unrealistic. For example, they may require that the child never spread clothes on the floor, never angry anyone or never allowed any

misdeed.

Stage 7. The final crisis and the cessation of adoption

Jessica sat in the hallway of the family children's house For girls, waiting for the arrival of his social worker. Now she will live here. She was drawn when she was three years old, and now she returns to the replacement family. "Parents said that if I was late once again, I will have to leave. Yesterday I was late - and I sit here. " "In the best times," Jessica recalls, "parents represented me as her daughter. And when problems began, I became "someone else."

The day comes when the child does not fulfill any of the claims presented it. A crisis arises in the family. Anyone, even the most insignificant event, can become the "last straw".

Adopters demand that the child is forever taken from their home. Often they want it to happen immediately. As a result, both "warring parties" remain with their pain: a child with feelings of anger, confusion and rejection, adoptive parents - with feelings of anger, guilt and sorrow.

If the adoptive parents feel that the deterioration of relations between them and the child can lead to the cessation of adoption, they must immediately appeal for help in adoption agency or a mutual assistance group. To assess the quality of relationships in an adoptive family, you can use the form below.

O 1. The problem of attachment formation as the main problem of early age

O 2. Fears

O 3. Aggression

O 4. Negatives

Conclusion
Preface

This book is first of all, the brightest memory of our favorite teacher - Clara Samoyovna Lebedinskaya. It is its subtle clinical approach to the study of early manifestations of violations emotional Development And the allocation of the main criteria for early diagnosis of early children's autism gave impetus for further psychological developments in this area. Deep faith Clara Samoovna in the fact that the possibility of the possibility of the highest possible correctional impacts in the presence of signs of affective disadvantaged in the first years of the child's life can be the prevention of severe forms of impaired emotional development, and we have been transferred to us.

Perennial practical work with various options for early child autism allowed us to see in naked form the lack of functioning or even the absence of those mechanisms of affective regulation, which is normal, coping with their task, may simply not appear on the surface. This is the usual way: search for the cause of developmental disorders, as a rule, has its consequence to deepen understanding the normal course of events. Here we had the opportunity to appreciate what is happening with the child in early childhood, how the affective mechanisms that organize the first forms of its minigration and interaction with the close and surrounding world are.

Understanding the logic of the emergence of difficulties, the emergence of distortion or delay of emotional development gives a completely defined way out in the correctional work. In addition, it allows you to realize the meaning of many techniques for the traditional education of young children, their focus on the development of these mechanisms for an affective organization of the behavior and consciousness of the child. Modern conditions Life, especially urban, inevitably leads to a significant loss of educational traditions worked in past generations, first of all, this is due to the frequent lack of a "big family" - upbringing out of the constant presence of the older generation, which still keeps and naturally uses these techniques for organizing the behavior of the baby. Young parents are often fond of modern, externally more pragmatic aspects of education and, above all, learning a small child - this is certainly not bad, but if it does not lose the connection between the parties of his mental life, if it continues to develop and individualize in general with close adult sense context.

Maybe this book, to some extent, will help them a little differently take a look at the inner world of the child and not only with the obvious difficulties of its emotional development. His prosperous and harmonious current, as you know, also implies periods of dramatic crises. Understanding their nature, as well as the inner meaning of other, calmer periods, will help close to keep confidence in themselves and it is better to prepare a kid to a meeting with an independent life.

The tasks of this book, therefore, it does not include tracking individuals of the child's mental functions - sensitor, speech, intellectual, his attention or memory. It was important for us to present the overall logic of complication of individual affective meanings in the interaction of the child with the world, the development of emotional relations with loved ones. We also hope that the understanding of this general development logic will help to use the experience of correctional work with children with serious impaired emotional development and in other, more common cases. It will help a diagnostic specialist to more adequately evaluate not only the supply of knowledge or skills, but also the emotional maturity of the baby, and the employee of the children's institution to build relationships in accordance with the emotional age of the child.

Special thanks to the author - parents of children with autism with which we collaborated throughout these years for their dedication, durability, the ability to rejoice in the slightest signs of the child's movement, readiness to share their experience and constantly learn from themselves, for their creative position and faith in our common cause . Parents and dedicated to this book.


Introduction

Birth of a child - an event is always and joyful and at the same time alarming for parents. Is everything safe? How to better educate kids? These and many other questions inevitably get up to loved ones. Of course, there are our own maternal intuition, advice of experienced grandmothers, books that can be read, finally - the possibility of regular visits to the clinic. However, even if the child is under thorough supervision and relatives and specialists, it does not always can save from the inattention to a number of signs of mental well-being.

The main criteria for the normal flow of ontogenesis is, as is well known, compliance with certain formal indicators of the development of individual mental functions (perception, motility, speech, etc.). At the same time, the timeliness of the main stages of development is monitored (when I sat down, got up, began to fix the look, follow the movement of the toy, take her in hand, coordinate the movement of the hand and look, when the bustle appeared, lay, first words, etc.). It is precisely for these famous signs to assess the well-being of the physical and mental development of the baby (Figurin N.L., Denisova M.P., 1949; Slikovanov N.P., 1960; Aksarin N.M., Kistyakovskaya M.Yu., 1969 ).

The passage of the stages of emotional development can also be tracked by the same age milestones. However, as a rule, this is not paying so much attention. Anxiety, perhaps, may arise if there are such bright manifestations of the well-being of emotional development in time in the behavior of the child, as a smile, interest in the human face, the recognition of loved ones. Also, the small responsiveness on exposure to outside, expressed passivity in contacts with the surroundings, or, on the contradiction, is also concerned. However, these alarming trends are often regarded as a manifestation of a special kid - brake or varying, impressionable.

For an adequate assessment of the well-being of the emerging emotional sphere, it is extremely important, however, not only not only the absence or delay in the emergence of a mandatory behavioral reaction, but also to determine its quality. As it seems neither paradoxical, the most severe and complex disorders of emotional development, which arise, for example, with early childhood autism and become apparent to 2.5 - 3 years old age, can naturally grow out of the barely caught, subtle signs of affective disadvantaged in the earliest Stages of ontogenesis. They can often be fixed by any formal criteria - as the development of such a child can be fully fitted at the boundaries of the norm, and sometimes it looks like a number of parameters and as ahead of. Even very attentive parents may not always correctly assess the peculiar features of the child's behavior, the nature of his response to loved ones and the environment as a whole. Sometimes significant signs of pathological trends of affective development are initially mistakenly perceived as positive traits The baby is extremely calm, "comfortable," without causing hands or fearless.

In many cases, parents even feel that with the child "something is wrong", but it is difficult to understand: whether such a special character, whether they themselves are not able to die and are correct in interactions with him. It is especially difficult to understand when such a child is the first. Awareness of problems often begins when mom appears the opportunity to compare his baby with its peers (at the reception in the clinic, with children of friends, on the playground).

Unfortunately, in most such cases, early appeal to specialists - pediatricians and neuropathologists does not help. While the child is in infancy, they often do not support parental concerns. When a child becomes a little older, and the growing difficulties of his organization begin to manifest themselves more clearly, hypotheses arise about the possible insufficiency of intellectual, speech development, some violations in the field of perception.

So, when he does not respond enough to appeal, it does not respond to the name - naturally the first suspicions that arise - does he have a hearing; If you do not use a speech - there is no speech violations. Suspicions of serious difficulties of affective development arise, as a rule, last. Nevertheless, these difficulties are quite common and the well-being of the development of the affective sphere should also be tracked carefully, as well as well-being of sensory, motor, speech and intellectual development. For this there are all the possibilities. The main phenomena and the mandatory stages of the normal emotional development of a small child are generally studied.

Our goal is to show the formation of the necessary mechanisms for the emotional regulation of behavior (O.S. Nikolskaya, 1990) as part of an early age. Some of them provide a consistent adaptation of a child to stable life cycles; Others allow the baby to adapt to unexpectedly changing circumstances, help him gain independence, cope with obstacles, danger. The most important of these mechanisms, entering into force almost immediately after the birth of a child and helping the aging of everyone else - the one that regulates its emotional relationships first with close people, and then with the complex world of human relations, which is entering into a child.

We will see that every time the inclusion of a new affective mechanism into the system of emotional regulation of behavior leads to temporary instability: the emergence of fears, whims, disobedience. Some of these moments are traditionally considered children's crisis. They need to be distinguished from the signs of real disadvantage in the early emotional development of a child leading to serious violations.


The main stages of the child's emotional development

In the first year of the child's life, it is impossible to consider his mental development outside its constant interaction with close people, primarily a mother, which is an intermediary and organizer of almost all of his contacts with the environment. Analysis of interaction in the Diade of Mother Child, a description of its dynamics in different age periods is devoted to a number of works of both domestic and foreign researchers (L.S.Vigotsky, 1983; M.I. Lisin, 1974; S.Y.Mescheryakova, 1978; G.H. Mazitova. 1977; N.N.Avdeeva, 1982, etc.). The child in the early stages of development depending on the mother, not only physically, as from the source of the implementation of all its vital needs in satiety, heat, safety, etc., but also from the regulator of his affective state: it can calm it, relax, cheer , console, increase endurance and customize the complication of relationships with the outside world. The most important condition for this is the ability to synchronize their emotional states: infection with a smile, synthony in the mood and experience of what is happening around. Therefore, it is so important for a child peace of mind and self-confidence that gives him a sense of reliability. This is so implemented by the primary need of a baby in stability and emotional comfort (E. Erickson, 1992.). Many people know how calmer and well-safe in comparison with the first are often growing second children - interacting with more experienced, skillful, and hence the easier and free mom.

The central moment of the psychic development of the child of the first months of life, as is known is the formation of individual affection - (Ainsworth M.D., 1962, etc.). As part of this emotional community, by L.S. Vygotsky in the experiences of "PRA", affect and develop individual affective mechanisms of the child - its ability in the future to independently resolve life tasks: to organize themselves, maintain and maintain activity in relations with the world. Consider in more detail that these affective mechanisms represent, as at an early age, their formation occurs in the process of interaction between the child with loved ones.

As it develops before the child, a number of more and more complex life tasks are consistent, and to solve them at each stage there is a need to actively incorporate a new way of organizing behavior.

The first such vital value becomes the mutual adaptation of the baby and mother to each other in ordinary situations of interaction - feeding, bathing, swaddling, bedding, and the like. They are repeated every day and the baby produces the first affective stereotypes of behavior, their first individual habits. This is its first effective mechanisms for organizing behaviors, this is the adaptation to sufficiently monotonous stable environmental conditions. A stable rhythm of everyday life primarily asks the mother of the child. It is the organizer and permanent intermediary of satisfying absolutely all the vital needs of the child in satiety, warmth, comfort, tactile contact, communication.

The assimilation of these common with close stable forms of life is the first adaptive achievement of the child. At the same time, these adaptation forms initially are still very limited. The infant of the first 2-3 months of life is characteristic of impatient, it is hard to respond to changing the routine of the day - a violation of the feeding mode, sleep-wake, can experience the change in the situation; The usual to certain "hands", the manner of a man caring for him most time, heavily worries his replacement (Brazelton T.V., 1972).

During this period, pronounced affective manifestations of the child are mainly negative (cry, crying). Their adaptive meaning is a simple signal impact on an adult, the call to satisfy the urgent needs, eliminate unpleasant.

However, these signals call for an adult not only to directly satisfy the specific need of a child. An adult seeks to find and more general ways of toddler comfort. The most common of them are firmly included in the traditional culture of the child's extinction, the teaching, baking, the teaching of the baby to the pacifier. It is characteristic that all of them are based on a rhythmic organization very important for infant sensations (first of all, vestibular, oral, tactile). The baby soon himself begins to actively use these techniques that help him calm down when there is no close. Subsequently, when the child seizes more complex ways of independent tone, the need for them becomes less - so by 6-7 months, the sucking of the finger usually stops (Braaselton T.B., 1982). However, they can and firmly entrenched if the baby is in situations of long discomfort and depride the attention of loved ones. So we often meet with endless swinging and sucking your finger, a corner of diaper in cases of the so-called "hospitalism" (Spitz R.A., 1945, Bowlby J., 1979).

Normally, closely close to master the ways to care for the child and receptions of control over its emotional state and the end of the third month is normalized by the emergence of equilibrium in the expression of positive and negative emotions (A. Vylon, 1967). The child's interaction with the mother is increasingly determined positive emotions. Since the basic stereotypes of satisfaction needs are already being addressed, the need for communication is now coming to communicate, in the attention of an adult, in its immediate emotional response.

As you know, the person's face itself from the first month of life is the most important and strongest ethological irritant for the infant. Now, however, its emotional expression, eyes and a smile are becoming increasingly significant. If for up to 2-3 months, any person, and as the experimental studies have shown, even a mask or a very rough imitation of the face (the circle and two points instead of the eyes) causes the reaction of revival in the infant and the preference in the time of fixation of any other stimulus presented, then after 3 months a child Waiting for the smile of an adult. Experimental data are also known according to which children are more often looking at the mother's face when it expresses pleasure (B.C.Epanchin, J.Paul, 1987). Moreover, there are observations (experiments O. Bazhenova, 1985), indicating that at this age, at the sight of an indifferent person who bowed over it, the child is experiencing anxiety and actively requires participation.

A new class of individual life stereotypes of a child is beginning to develop - the methods of establishing and maintaining communications, direct emotional communication. A previously undifferentiated demanding cry begins to acquire the intonation of the request (J. Bruner, 1977). The child assimilates more diverse forms of communication, entering the usual rituals of emotional interaction with adults in different situations: care for it and the stereotypes of early games adopted in his family. The most common common form of common pleasure at this time is the game of hide and seek - the appearance and disappearance of the attitude of the attitude of the adult face, when he himself closes his face or a second child's face. The moment of renewing the eye contact is experiencing the baby most acute and causes delight.

In the future, in common with adult games, not only direct emotional contamination is becoming increasingly important, but also a general concentration on a sensory color and sounding toy. With her help, the adult gets the opportunity not only to calm the baby, but also cheer it up, raise his activity. It is important to note that in these interactions their rhythm and repeatability continues to maintain.

Soon the child itself gets the possibility of self-toning itself with the help of active manipulation of the sensory environment. By this time, he already appears the ability not to just take a toy, but also coordinated to act by it, removing a variety of sensory sensations (knock, throw, thrust, etc.). Of course, these actions give it more complex and diverse feelings than primitive actions of self-decrees characteristic of a child more younger age. However, they also remain rhythmically organized, more to reproduce a certain desired sensory effect than an active inspection of the environment. The stage of formation and predominance in the behavior of "circular reactions" (according to J. Piage) covers a significant part of the second half of the child's life.

Shortly after the child begins to pull up and rely on the legs, its infinite "jumping" and throwing toys or pacifiers from the bed become characteristic. It is important that with the greatest intensity and, most importantly, the greatest joy, this circulating activity turns into a game in the presence and with the participation of an adult. At the same time, the child is enjoying not only from the actions performed, but from the reaction of close. The same circulating nature acquires at this age and earlier game in the "Hyperships". Now the child himself can hide and sticking out, catching an adult look.

Such circulating activity allows the child to independently support the sensations of reliability and stability in relations with the world. At the same time, with their help, the further development of interaction with loved ones occurs. It is precisely on the basis of such circulating reactions that gaming rituals usually make up, which makes it possible to combine attention, the total concentration is not only directly among each other, but also some facility of common pleasure. These rituals prepare the possibility of developing the first prototective actions (J.Bruner, 1975), denoting these situations and preparing the child and adult to manage the attention of each other and coordinate emotional assessments.

The development of the child's readiness is connected with the opportunity to control the child's readiness to ensure that an adult and the appearance of its own index gesture. The possibility of coordinated interaction begins to develop. Until now, the directional appeal to adult was not so important for the child. They constituted such a migrant unity that the desires of the child were performed as it were automatically, in response to a simple designation of discomfort or demand. If earlier the child just stretched to the object of desire, now he pulls his hands to him, but at the same time turns to adult, the first appeals and indicative gestures are born.

Thus, feedback is formed and in emotional interaction. The child gradually begins to take into account the emotional adult response to its actions. If at an earlier stage of development, the kid has observed a primitive affective infection with the most striking state of another person (initially yawn, later - laughter, crying) is its plastic reflection, now the true imitation of the emotional reactions of adults begins to grow up from it. So, a five-month-old child can already imitate the expression of the face of the mother and with pleasure to play with the expression of his face in the mirror (Braaselton T.V., 1982). It is originally developed in the game, this ability of an adequate emotional response leads to reciprocal coordination of emotional states, as a result, the child appears the possibility of more active and diverse impact on the surrounding. By half a year, the child is already well recognized by the main emotions of his loved ones and begins to express differently and adequately situations surprise, insult, sadness, anger, joy, confusion, embarrassment, etc.

This period of intensive formation of the operational side of emotional interaction in the Diade of the Mother Child. Of course, the reciprocality of behavior is achieved when all the necessary technical components of this interaction appear: the possibilities of independently change the position of the body, to change the distance of communication, facial expressions, but the central role among factors belongs to the look as a strongest behavior regulator (Argile, 1967, 69).

It should also be noted that the fundamental changes in the assessment of the affective state of another person occurring during the first half of the child's life are to appear greater orientation on its sign (positive, negative, or neutral), that is, on the quality of this state. According to the experimental study (Lisin M.I., Meshcheryakova S.Yu., Sorokina A.I., 1983) The children of the first half of the year react more sensitively to the difference in the intensity of adult attention, for them is not so important allocation of negative expressions (expressions of wrath, ukrorisna ). At that time, he dramatically manifests a special - a negative reaction to the indifference of an adult: in this case, the child looks alarmed, oppressed, distressed, and after a while his response behavior slows down sharply. It was in the second half of the year of life, babies begin to evaluate the expression of the displeasure of an adult as something fundamentally important and react to it correspondently - they themselves frown themselves, they are crying offended.

The whole great electoral orientation of the child on the emotional reactions of a close man qualitatively changes his relationship with the environment. It becomes less dependent on its immediate incentives and more dependent on the mediating emotional reaction of the mother, now not just soothing or activating, but already essentially organizing his behavior. A close adult can more successfully "persuade the" child a little wait, to suffer in conditions of discomfort, "infect" with their tranquility and positive emotion, focus on an important impression. A. Geesell (1974) confirm that during the period of 7-8 months, the baby acquires significantly greater affective stability in contacts with the world, and a vast contribution to achieving its differentiated orientation of the child to the emotional reaction of the mother is introduced.

However, these, more sophistic ways The development of stable reliable relationships with the world is also insufficient. Now the child becomes vulnerable in its adaptation features in a new way. It begins to demonstrate anxiety in violation not so much the usual forms of care as a stereotype of relationships with loved ones. It is known that at this age, the alarm naturally occurs when the mother's care is the center of affective adaptation of the child to the world. The result of the development of a stereotype of individual relations with loved ones is and characteristic of age 8 months of "foreign person": a child at the form of an unfamiliar person demonstrates fear and displeasure (E.Maccoby, J.Masters, 1970; Blwhite, 1975), or at least embarrassment and confusion (E.O.Smirnova, I.A. Kontdovich, 1973). This phenomenon testifies not only that the child well differentiates his and strangers. It is also characteristic that although the very recognition of the mother's child is celebrated before the semi-annual age, children not older than 6 months reveal their ability to learn close to the fact that when interacting with them, they are more rejoiced and more often manifests the initiative than in contacts with outsiders - this is the so-called Positive recognition "(Mazitova G.Kh., 1979). Now the lack of close is hard for the child, as well as in 2 months the child was particularly sensitive to the constancy of the person who caregoes him, so now it needs the stability of the emotional response of the mother.

This new period of anxiety and fears of a child actually reflects the success in its development, but puts new challenges before adults: to help the child to overcome increasing alarms in violation of the usual forms of life. And mechanisms that can resolve these tasks again begin to ripen in general games. The content of these games, of course, the immediate emotional contamination and communication around the toy remains. At the same time, an increasing place in them begins to occupy the experience of completely special impressions. Now it starts to attract and cheer what was scarecrow before. The first fears of the child were associated with a rapid movement to it, a sharp imbalance of equilibrium, a sudden interruption of the usual rhythm. As part of the general game, such impressions begin to mix it: he laughs when his "boda", "catch up", throw on his knees and arms. The games are increasingly introduced new and surprise, it is woven into the overall usual rhythmic organization, in the usual repetitive stereotype of the game as the first-emerging element of the plot, adventure - "Now I eat you", "on the bumps, in the yam of the boo ', etc. P. So the child begins to train the opportunity to survive the situation of stereotype violations, experience the pleasure of surprise.

These tasks are all the more relevant that at this time the whole life situation is significantly changing. This is due primarily to the fact that the baby in the process of its growth is becoming increasingly enduring, movable and more often it turns out to be in unexpected, unstable situations - before it is new adaptive tasks. A. Ballon characterizes this age that the "new" begins to scare a child less and more pleasure, he becomes more and more curious. A fundamentally new relations with the world are beginning to develop, which are based on the development of affective adaptation mechanisms for changing, uncertain conditions - expansion mechanisms. They, as mentioned above, are first honored by a child under the protection of an adult in line with a common game as an experience of a sharp point with its instant positive permit.

So, by the end of the first year, the child comes on there is no stereotypical "circular activity" in manipulations with objects, toys; It becomes important not so much repeatability and reliability as novelty, the opening of new opportunities. Therefore, he appears the ability to be more flexible, enterprising in handling toys. And again the possibilities obtained in the game begin to gradually be used by a child for real adaptation.

About 9-10 months have been observed the first attempts to actively study the near space. It becomes really possible not only because the child receives the possibility of independent movement by this time (first of all crawling, he begins to break away from mom, explore distant and unfamiliar places). It is the appearance of curiosity, possibilities in violation of the usual movement of events not to panic, but interest is based on the development of this research behavior. In addition, now the child begins to pay attention not only to the subject of interest to its object, but also on the obstacle to the goal. It begins to take into account, and then examine, look for ways to overcome the barrier, for the first time it gets the opportunity to see and evaluate the results of his trial and errors, without which it is impossible to establish causal relationships. It is at this time that the first attempts of the kid usually appear to push the obstacle to the desired thing with the help of a stick, another toy, that is, the appearance of the first experience of using guns. It is known that these attempts are estimated as very an important stage In the intellectual development of the child, but it is impossible to achieve it without the formation of an appropriate affective mechanism of expansion - adaptation to changing conditions mobilizing to master the new, overcoming the obstacle.

As is well known, along with the acquisition of self-movement skills in space, the most important adaptation achievement by the end of the first year is the beginning of the development of speech. Of course, it was wrong to conduct a countdown of speech development from the emergence of the first words, which is characteristic of this time. Before that, the most important stage in the development of the proto language was passed. Already from the very first months, the baby actively communicated with his friends with a buzzing, in this interaction, he studied to understand and repeat the intonation of the mother, to express his states and pronounce the phonam of the native language.

The stage of the poverty is just reflecting this ability of the child to reproduce sustainable combinations of sounds, and it turns into some point in his favorite occupation. Sheet is stimulated by the participation of an adult and constantly accompanies common games. Increasingly, the child begins to purely repeat behind the mother and inspire the newest suitable suitable for him in his pushing. Interestingly, if at this moment my mother repeats the sounds reproduced by them, he starts to play especially actively. So it is baptized more and more approaching the sound of the native language.

Against this background, sustainable designations of the most familiar and favorite household and gaming activities begin to be recorded. Fastening for these repetitive situations of the first protosals ("Bai-Bai", "Ku-ku", "Buk", "Tick-so", "while") becomes possible due to the support for the affective stereotype of the interaction of adult and the child . So we see that speech development It is directly dependent on the formation of an affective behavior mechanisms.

With the development of the stereotype of emotional interaction, the dissection of a fusion of more than certain relations of the adult and the child in it is connected and the appearance of the first "real" words used as a request, appeal, appeal, and, finally, the instruction (Mom, Give, etc.) . Thus, the possibilities of mediated contact are even more expanding - not only through objects, toys, gestures, but already through the word. The word begins to denote the quality of the relationship, the quality of what is happening with the child ("good", "you can not", "you can", "Bolyak", "Bo-Bo"), thus preparing new opportunity Regulation of his behavior. In the meantime, he himself uses these words for fun, for playing, confirming pleasant repeatability or novelty situations, the possibility of controlling it.

Thus, at the end of the first year, the child is experiencing a state not just well-being, but rather even some emotional lifting: it owns a fairly designed life stereotype, developed methods of emotional interaction with loved ones, is active in mastering the new. He is in the center of attention of all close, its achievements are discussed and cause universal admiration. The baby begins to demonstrate his skills at the request and it also turns for him in fascinating game, A means of enhancing the emotional reaction of loved ones. It is not by chance that the first sustainable successes appear in mastering the elements of social skills (with pleasure hugs and kisses at the request, saying goodbye, begins to ask for a pot, maintain a cup or spoon, etc.) and enough unfolded gaming rituals, such as "Ladushka", "forty-crow". Very important in the future of further development becomes the possibility of a longer association of the child's attention with close on some common action, the ability to view a picture in a book in a book, show a cockerel or a dog, to demonstrate how they are "talking", listening to sufficiently long children's poems. Nevertheless, the loss of emotional equilibrium is again becoming the next step in affective development - the first serious crisis with adults is characteristic of the one-year-old child.

By definition, L.S. Vigotsky, the formation of walking and the moment of entry into the period of this crisis - the period "the rapid development of affective life is the first stage of the development of children's will." Although traditionally, this crisis is not considered to be acute, nevertheless, in normal conditions, pronounced sleep and wakefulness disorders, loss of appetite, an increase in emotional lability (the emergence of plasticity, contradiction). These difficulties appear perfectly natural and fit into the overall logic of affective development. Consider what is the meaning of the shocks at this time with the child.

Mastering walking sharply changes life situation. An adult ceases to be a prerequisite for the adaptation of a child who is increasingly one on one with the surrounding world and at times starts to lose close as an indispensable emotional landmark. During this period, not only the physical, but also the psychic branch of the child from an adult is to allocate its self-assumption from the former merging experience "We".

The difficulty of adapting, which is experiencing a child at this critical time, are manifested in the fact that he remains alone, falls under the power of the power impact of the surrounding sensory field. At this time, the impressions begin to capture the child so much that it begins to interfere with the development of its interaction with adults. It is extremely difficult for him to break away from the object's interested him and share attention with adults (as it was before). It is hard to get away, he is too immersed in the ripping of the pyramid rings, having a typewriter, can not tear off her eyes, his sanding of sand is captured, shifting pebbles. A characteristic example of the "field" behavior can also be the desire to run belessless in the direction of the item you like, perform actions dictated by the situation and properties of items: endlessly open and close the doors, climb into all boxes in a row, not even focusing on their contents, climb on the stairs, chairs , "stick" to the fence, etc. At the same time, a close child, who has recently spent it by regulating behavior, arises before the fact that he often cannot lead the baby from some random impression.


© 2015-2019 Site
All rights to belong to their authors. This site does not pretend to authorship, but provides free use.
Page Creation Date: 2016-08-07

Help in raising children with special emotional development (early age) Baenna Elena Rostislavovna

The main stages of the child's emotional development in the norm

The process of mental development of the child in the first year of life is impossible to consider outside of its permanent interaction with the mother, which is an intermediary and organizer of almost all his contacts with the outside world. Analysis of the interaction process in the Diade mother Diet.His speakers in different age periods are devoted to a number of works of both domestic and foreign researchers (Vyotsky LS, 1983; Lisina M.I., 1974; Meshcheryakova S.Yu., 1978; Mazitova G.Kh., 1977; Avdeeva N.N., 1982, etc.). The child in the early stages of development depends on the mother not only physically - from the source of the provision of all its vital needs (in satiety, heat, safety, etc.), but also from the regulator of its emotional state: it can calm down, relax, cheer , console, support emotional sustainability, stamina, increase activity, reduce depletion and set up for the complication of relationships with the surrounding world. The most important condition for this is the possibility of synchronizing the emotional states of the mother and child: infection with a smile, mood, the appearance of empathy about what is happening around. For a child, maternal tranquility and self-confidence, giving him a sense of reliability, since this is how the primary need of a baby in stability and emotional comfort (Erickson E., 1992) is being implemented. Many people know how tranquil and prosperous in comparison with the first is often the second child: it interacts with an already experienced mom - skillful and easier in communication.

1st stage - Age up to 2-3 months. The central moment of the psychic development of the child in the first months of life, as is known, is the formation individual attachment (Ainsworth M.d., 1962, etc.). As part of this emotional community, by L.S. Vygotsky (1984), in the experience of "PRA WE", mature and develop individual affective mechanisms of the child, which in the future are transformed into the ability to independently resolve life tasks: to organize themselves, maintain and maintain activity in relations with the world.

Let us consider in more detail these affective mechanisms and the processes of their formation at an early age when the child's interaction with loved ones.

In the process of development, the child consistently upset increasingly complex life tasks, and to solve them at each stage there is a need for an active inclusion in the work of a new way of organizing behavior.

The first such vital task is the mutual adaptation of a baby and mother to each other in ordinary interaction situations (feeding, swimming, swaddling, laying sleeping, etc.). These situations are repeated from day to day, and it is in them the baby produces the first affective stereotypes of behavior, their first individual habits (for example, takes a pacifier or not, falls asleep on her mother's hands or in a crib, etc.). So there is a primary adaptation of the child to the environmental conditions and, above all, to those of them that are fairly stable and monotonous. The stability (regularity and rhythm) of everyday life asks first of all the child's mother, because, as already mentioned, it is the organizer and a permanent mediator of meeting absolutely all the vital needs of the child (in fullness, warmth, comfort, tactile contacts, communication and others).

These first, dominant forms of adaptation of the child, based on the assimilation of common with the close environment of stable elements of life, are still very limited. The infant of the first two or three months of life is characteristic of impatient, he reacts poorly to a change in the routine of the day, for example, on a violation of feeding mode, sleep-wake, etc.), to change the situation; He is hardly experiencing a replacement for man who caring him, getting used to certain "hands" and behavior manner (Brazelton T.V., 1972).

The pronounced affective manifestations of the child in this period are mainly negative and expressed in a cry or crying. Their adaptive meaning is a simple signal impact on an adult, the call to satisfy the urgent needs, eliminate unpleasant. However, these signals call for an adult not only to directly satisfy the specific need of a child. An adult, as a rule, applies and more general ways of toddler comfort. The most common of them are firmly included in the traditional culture. extraction Child teaching, taucan, nipple-dummy. It is characteristic that all of them are based on a rhythmic organization of very important sensations for the infant, primarily vestibular, oral, tactile. The baby soon himself begins to actively use these and others (for example, sucking a finger) techniques that help him calm down when there is no close one nearby. Subsequently, when a child seizes more complex ways of "complacency" and " selfonizing "The need for them becomes less - so, to six-seven months, the sucking of the finger usually stops (Braaselton T.B., 1982). However, these techniques may consolidate firmly if the baby is in conditions of long discomfort (deprived of the attention of loved ones, etc.). An example is often observable in children and older elderly endless rocking and sucking of a finger or a corner of diaper in cases of the so-called hospitalism (temporary change in the mental condition and behavior of a child caused by chronic disadvantage of communication) (Spitz R.A., 1945; Bowlby J., 1979).

Normally, close to the child's care and techniques for controlling its emotional state, therefore, as a rule, the end of the third month is characterized by the emergence of equilibrium in the expression of positive and negative emotions (Wallon A., 1967; Vygotsky LS, 1984) And the interaction of the child with the mother is increasingly begins to determine positive emotions.

2nd stage - From 3 to 5-6 months. By this time, the main stereotypes of satisfaction of the child's needs were already developed, and his need for communication, attention and direct emotional response of an adult comes to the fore.

As you know, the person's face itself from the first month of life is for the baby the strongest and significant stimulus. Now, however, its emotional expression, eyes and a smile closely becomes increasingly significant. If the baby is two or three months on any face, and even on its very rough imitation (in the experiment, for example, a circle and two points instead of eyes) or a mask reacts with revitalization and prefers it to fix it with any other incentive, then after three months a child waiting for smilesadult Experimental data are also known, according to which children are more often looking at the mother's face when it expresses (Epanchin B.C., Paul J., 1987). Moreover, there are observations (experiments O.V. Bazhenova, 1985), indicating that at this age, the child at the sight of an indifferent person who bowed over him is worrying and anxiety.

A new class of individual life stereotypes of a child is beginning to develop - the methods of establishing and maintaining communications, direct emotional communication. Previously, the demanding cry begins to become more diverse, acquires the intonation of a request (Brunner J., 1977). The child absorbs more and more diverse forms of communication, participating in the usual rituals of emotional interaction with adults in various situations (child care, stereotypes of early games adopted in this family, etc.). The most common form and method of obtaining a common pleasure at this time becomes playing in the "Hyperships" - the appearance and disappearance from the field of sight of the child's child's face, when the last for a second closes his face or the face of the child. The moment of renewing the eye contact is experiencing the baby most acute and causes a stormy delight.

In the future, in general games with adults, not only the immediate emotional "infection", but also a general concentration, for example, on a bright color and sounding toy, is becoming increasingly important. With its help, the adult gets the opportunity not only to calm the baby, but also cheer it up, increase its activity. It should be noted that in the interactions of this kind, their rhythmic and repeated character continues to play.

Soon the child himself gets the ability to independently tone itself by active manipulation of the sensory environment. By this time, he already appears the ability not to just take the toy, but also to carry out various coordinated actions with it (knock, throw, vitet, etc.), getting a variety of sensory sensations. It should be especially noted that the latter are much more complex and diverse than those related to primitive actions of self-esteem characteristic of the child aged two to three months. Nevertheless, they still remain rhythmically organized and more aimed at reproducing a certain desired sensory (sound, visual, tactile) effect than an active inspection of the medium.

It should also be noted that indigenous changes in the assessment of the child's affective state of another person who occur during the first half of life is to appear greater orientation on qualitythis state, that is, on its "sign" (positive, negative, or neutral). According to the experimental research (Lisin M.I., Meshcheryakova S.Yu., Sorokina A.I., 1983), the children of the first half of the year react more sensitively to the difference in the intensity of attention adult For them, for example, not so essential that the expression of an adult in this moment Negative (with an expression of anger, ukrizna), but at the same time, the children of this age sharply show a special negative reaction to the indifference of the adult, and in this case the child looks alarmed, oppressed, distressed.

3rd stage - from 5-6 to 10-11 months this is the stage of formation and predominance in the behavior of "circular (circular) reactions" (according to J. Piage, 1956), which covers a significant part of the second half of the child's life.

Shortly after the child begins to pull up and rely on the legs, it becomes characteristic of the endless jumping and throwing the toy or pacifiers from the crib. It is important that with the greatest intensity and, most importantly, with the greatest joy of this circulating activity turns into a game in the presence and with the participation of an adult. At the same time, the child enjoys not only from the actions performed by him, but from the adult reaction. The same nature of the infinite repetition acquires at this age and earlier game in the "Hyperships". Now the child can already hide and hang out, catching an adult look. Such repeated activity allows the child to independently support the sense of reliability and stability in relations with the world. At the same time, with its help, the further development of interactions with loved ones occurs. It is based on such equally reproducible reactions that usually develop gaming rituals that give an adult and child the opportunity to combine attention, focus not only directly on each other, but also on any external object delivering to them mutual pleasure. These rituals prepare the possibility of the appearance of the first designations of such situations and prepare both a child and an adult to manage each other's attention and coordinate their emotional reactions and evaluations.

With the ability to manage the attention of another, the development of the child's readiness is associated with the child's readiness to follow the instrumental gestures of the adult and the appearance at this stage of its own index gesture.

The ability to coordinated interaction begins to form. Until now, the directional appeal to the adult was not so important for the child. An adult and the child made up so mnit unity that the desires of the baby were performed as if automatically - in response to a simple designation of them any requirement or discomfort. If earlier the child just stretched to the object of desire, now he stretches his handles to him, asking her look at the adult, which indicates the appearance of the first appeals and indicing gesture.

Feedback is formed and in emotional interaction. The child gradually begins to take into account the emotional adult response to its actions. If at an earlier stage of development, the kid had a primitive affective "infection" with the most striking state of another person (initially zoo, later - laughter, crying), expressed in the plastic reflection of this state, now begins to form the ability to correctly imitate emotional adult responses. So, a five-month-old child can already imitate the expression of the face of the mother and with pleasure to play with the expression of his face in the mirror (Braaselton T.V., 1982). This ability to adequate emotional response, manufactured initially in the game, leads to mutual coordination of emotional states; As a result, the child appears the possibility of more active and diverse impact on the surrounding. By six months, the child already recognizes the basic emotions of its loved ones and begins to express its attitude to one or another situation (surprise, grieving, sadness, anger, joy, confusion, embarrassment, etc.).

Thus, the period described is the stage of intensive formation of the technical side of emotional interaction in the Diade mother child Mastering the child of all necessary components necessary - such, for example, as an opportunity to independently change the position of the body, the distance of communication, the expression of the person, - but the central role definitely belongs to the look as the strongest behavior regulator.

In the second half of the year, babies, as a rule, are already beginning to evaluate the expression of the displeasure of an adult as something fundamentally important and respond to it accordingly (frowning, removing, offended crying).

All bo? Legal electoral orientation of the child on the emotional reactions of a close man qualitatively changes his relationship with the environment. It becomes less dependent on its immediate incentives and more dependent - from the mediated emotional reaction of the mother, now it is not just soothing or activating, and the behavior already organizing its organizing behavior. Close adult with all bo? Successful success is able to "persuade" the child a little wait, to suffer certain uncomfortable conditions, "infect" with its calmness and positive emotions, to focus the attention of the child on anything important or interesting. The data of A. Gezella (1974) confirm that at the age of 7-8 months, the kid acquires significantly more affective stability regarding contacts with the world, and it can be assumed that a vast contribution to its achievement makes a differentiated orientation of the child on the emotional reaction of the mother.

However, these, more complex, methods for developing stable reliable relationships of the child with the world are also insufficient. The baby becomes a new way in its adaptation features. It begins to demonstrate anxiety in violation not so much the usual forms of care as a stereotype of relationships with loved ones. It was mentioned that the recognition of the mother's baby was noted before the semi-annual age, this was manifested that when interacting with it, he was more rejoiced and more often showed the initiative than with contacts with other people, this is the so-called positive recognition (Mazitova G. H., 1979. ). Now the absence of a close adult is perceived painfully. When careing the mother - the center of affective adaptation of the baby to the world - at this age the child naturally emerges. Just as in a two-month aged, the child was particularly sensitive to the constancy of the person who caring him, now he needs the stability of the emotional response of the mother.

The result of the development of a stereotype of individual relationships with loved ones is and characteristic of age 8 months fear of "foreign person": at the sight of an unfamiliar person, the child demonstrates fear and displeasure (Maccoby E., Masters J., 1970; White BL, 1975) or at least embarrassment and confusion (Smirnova E.O., Kondratovich I.A., 1973).

This new period of anxiety and fears of a child actually reflects the progress in its development, but puts before adults. new task: To help the child to overcome the alarm arising from violation of the usual forms of life. Mechanisms that can resolve this task begin to "ripen", as before, in general games. The content of these games, of course, remains the direct emotional "infection" and communication about the toy. At the same time, an increasing place in them begins to occupy the experience of completely new and special impressions. Now the baby begins to attract and cheer what he used to scarech. The very first fears of the child were associated with a rapid approach to it, a sharp imbalance of equilibrium, a sudden interruption of the usual rhythm. At this stage, in the framework of the overall game, such actions begin to mix it: he laughs when it is "bodies", "catch up", throw on his knees and arms, etc. The games are making more and more novelty and surprises, woven as the first element. The plot, the adventure in the common, habitual for the baby rhythmically organized and habitually repeated stereotype of the game ("Now I eat you", "on the bumps, in the hole of the booze", etc.). So the child begins to train the opportunity to survive the situation of stereotype violations and experience surprise.

These tasks are all the more relevant that at this time the whole life situation is significantly changing. The kid in the process of its growth is becoming more and more rolling and more often in unexpected, unstable situations, in connection with which, naturally, new adaptive tasks come up with. A. Vylon (1967) believes that at this age "new" begins to scare less and more attract a child, bringing him pleasure, in connection with which he is becoming more and more curious. A fundamentally new relationship with the outside world is beginning to develop, which are based on the development of affective adaptation mechanisms for changing, uncertain conditions - expansion mechanisms. They, as mentioned above, are first tested by a child in line with a common game under the protection of an adult as an experience of a sharp point with its instant positive resolution.

So, by the end of the first year, the child decreases stereotypical "circular activity" in manipulations with objects. It is important for him not so much repeatability and reliability, as novelty and the opening of new opportunities, and therefore the ability to be more entrigible, inventive in handling toys, and the possibilities obtained in the game, as before, are gradually starting to be used by a child for real adaptation.

About 9-10 months have been observed the first attempts to actively study the near space. It becomes really possible not only because the child receives the possibility of independent movement by this time, first of all crawling (it begins to break away from mom, explore distant and unfamiliar places). It is the emergence of curiosity, possibilities in violation of the usual stroke of events to experience not a panic, but interest is based on the development of this research behavior. In addition, now the child begins to pay attention not only to the subject of interest to his object, but also on the obstacle to the goal, which he begins to take into account, and then examine, look for ways to overcome it. So the baby first gets the opportunity to see and evaluate the results of its own samples and errors, without which it is impossible to establish causal relationships. It is at this time that the first attempts of the baby usually appear to push the obstacle, reach the desired thing with the help of a stick, another toy, that is, the manifestations of the first experience of using guns. It is known that these attempts are estimated as a very important stage in the intellectual development of the child, but it is impossible to achieve it without the formation of a relevant affective expansion mechanism - adaptation to changing conditions that mobilize the child to master the new, to overcome the obstacles, etc.

As is well known, along with the acquisition of self-movement skills in space, the most important adaptation achievement by the end of the first year is the beginning of the development of speech. It would be incorrect to count the beginning of this process since the appearance of the first words, which is characteristic of this time. Already from the very first months, the baby actively communicated with his friends with the help of a buzzing, in this interaction he learned to understand and repeat the intonation of the mother, express his states and the sounds and their combinations characteristic of their native language.

Stage Lepota Just reflects this ability of the child to reproduce sustainable combinations of sounds, which at some point turns into his favorite occupation. Sheet is stimulated by the participation of an adult and constantly accompanies common games. Increasingly, the child begins to purely repeat after mom and climb into his cakes new attractive sounding for him. Interestingly, if at this moment the mother will repeat the sounds played by them, he will start playing them especially actively. So gradually, the baby becomes more and more approaching the sound of the native language.

Against this background, sustainable designations of the most familiar and favorite household and gaming activities begin to be recorded. Consolidation of these repetitive situations of the first designations ( "Bai-Bai", "Ku-ku", "Buk", "Tik-So", "While") It becomes possible due to the support on the affective stereotype of the interaction of an adult and the child. Thus, it is obvious that both speech development is directly dependent on the formation of an affective behavior organization mechanisms.

With the development of the stereotype of the emotional interaction of the adult and the child and the decay from their unity, more and more definite relations are connected and the emergence of the first "real" words used by the baby as a request, appeal, and, finally, the indication (" mom, "Dai" etc.). Thus, the possibilities of mediated contact are even more expanding - not only through objects, toys, gestures, but already through the word. The word begins to designate both a qualitative assessment of what is happening with the child ( "Good", "Bolya", "Bo-Bo", "You can", "you can not"), thus preparing new opportunities for regulating his behavior. In the meantime, the baby himself uses these words for pleasure, games, confirmation of novelty or pleasant repetition of the situation, the possibility of controlling it.

Thus, at the end of the first year of life, the child is experiencing a state not just well-being, but rather even some emotional lifting: it already owns a sufficiently developed life stereotype, developed methods of emotional interaction with loved ones, is active in mastering the new. He is in the center of attention of all close, its achievements are discussed and cause universal admiration. The baby begins to demonstrate his skills at the request, and this also turns into a fascinating game, into a means of strengthening the emotional reaction of loved ones. In this background, the first sustainable successes appear in mastering both elements of social skills (enclosure and kisses and kisses, says goodbye, starts to ask for a pot, maintain a cup or spoon, etc.), and sufficiently deployed game rituals ("Ladushki", "forty-crow" and others). In the future, further development is extremely important, the possibility of a longer unification of the attention of a child and a close adult is becoming a common action, such as a joint viewing of a picture in a book, a cockerel or dog showing, with a demonstration of how they are "talking"; Hearing enough long children's poems, etc. Nevertheless, the loss of emotional equilibrium is again becoming the next step in affective development - the first serious crisis in relations with adults becomes the next step in affective development.

By definition by L.S. Vigotsky, becoming walking And there is a moment of entry into the period of this crisis, during the "rapid development of affective life - the first stage of the development of children's will." Although traditionally, this crisis is not considered to be acute, nevertheless, at this time, there may be pronounced sleep and wakefulness disorders, the loss of appetite, an increase in emotional lability (the emergence of plasticity, contiguity). The emergence of these difficulties is perfectly natural and placed in the overall logic of affective development. Consider what is the meaning of the shocks at this time with the child.

Mastering walking dramatically changes the life situation. The adult ceases to be a prerequisite for the adaptation of a child who is increasingly one on one with the surrounding world and at times begins to "lose" close as an indispensable emotional landmark. During this period, not only the physical, but also the mental branch of the child from the adult is to allocate its self-assumption from the former fusion "We".

The difficulty of adapting, which is experiencing a child at this critical time, are manifested in the fact that he remains alone, falls under the power of the power impact of the surrounding sensory field. At this time, the external impressions begin to capture the child so much that it interferes with the development of his interaction with adults. It is extremely difficult for him to tear away from the object's interested him and, as it was before, divided attention with adults. The baby is impossible to call: it is too immersed in the renovation of the pyramid rings; selflessly carries the machine, unable to tear away from it; It captures sanding, transfer of pebbles, etc. The characteristic example of the "field" behavior (behavior defined by objects that randomly appear in the child's perception field) can also serve the desire to be furious to run away in the direction of the subject, perform actions dictated by the situation and properties of objects : Endlessly open and close the doors, climb into all boxes in a row, not even focusing on their contents, climb on the stairs, chairs, "stick" to the fence, etc. At the same time, a close child, who has recently spent the regulation of his behavior, reveals That often he is not at all able to "tear up" the baby from some random impression.

When trying to suppress such tendencies in the behavior of the child by prohibiting and / or direct imposition of their behavioral logic, parents face that earlier obedient and calm child becomes stubborn and capricious, demonstrating bright protest reactions - negativism, aggression. The kid can even bite or hit an adult. Thus, the mother begins to feel that it loses the emotional control over the situation of interaction with the baby, which turns out to be fully captured by the "field" temptations arising in front of him.

The least painful way out of the first affective crisis is based on an adult understanding of the fact that the difficulties of interaction with the child are caused by its immediate capture of the dynamics of the surrounding sensory field. In this case, he does not shift the guilt on a child and does not enter into conflict with neither the baby or field trends, but, trying to distract the baby soon, uses them, finding another bright impression and switches the child's attention in a different direction. Great help in this has an indicable gesture and word-indication. Each attentive mother knows that the child does not have a serious protest reaction, if you do not try to just pull it away from puddles or fence or prohibit selected selected pebbles, and specify another, no less bright, affective environmental point ( "Won bird flew", "Look, what a car"), that is, use another distracting activity, which is also set by the field ( "Ran out on that track" etc.).

It is characteristic that such techniques are traditionally accepted for the organization of a one-year-old child. Their usually offers an experienced grandmother, but the mother who is in a hurry can too upset the unexpected change in relationships with the baby, and, as a result, she often tries to "reverse" him, demanding good behavior at the moment when he just cannot fulfill her request. For example, the kid often cannot interrupt its action if it is not completed (not a book dolistan, the pyramid is not matured, the contents of the box are completely unlocked, etc.). Conflicts are often associated with situations characteristic of this crisis time. It makes it difficult, for example, to put on a pot of requested already before that child. There is a disorder in a feeding situation, when a child who has already held in his hand, the child begins to actively smear the food on the table, difficulties appear both with access to a walk, and with returning home, with bedding, etc. It should be specially emphasized that the emergence of a sustainable conflict It may cause exacerbation of the manifestations of the crisis described above, which, with appropriate correct attitude, they can be smoothed.

Conduct "distracting maneuvers" does not mean "going on" at a capricious child. The "distracting maneuvers" are both at the same time as an ambulance in organizing the behavior of a child, and a way to preserve emotional communications with the baby, and a means of pleasure and comfort in cooperation with him. They protect the baby from the accumulation of negative experience, keep him the necessary ideas about themselves as a good, obedient child. In addition, under their protection, the possibility of "aging" mechanisms of independent overcoming impulsive trends are obtained. It should be noted that this process is also extremely difficult without special aid Close, and this help, also provided quite naturally, is not considered close as some special effort. Traditionally, at this time, it's not only what happens to him now (as it has already happened to the year), but also what will happen in the near-year), but also what happens in the near future ( "Now we will buy a milk, then let's go on a slide, say hello to children, we ride a little and go home ..."). It is characteristic that at that time the child begins to listen to the stories about himself, about his recent "exploits." Such a semantic commentary helps to introduce a momentary situation into a common life context.

At this time, the development of speech makes it possible to start the child yourself to turn on this comment. He is no longer only with pleasure, but also calls individual bright phenomena (events, items, etc.), noting what is happening not only for a close adult, as it was before, but also for himself. The beginning of the development of the active dictionary of the child is in many ways with the desire to streamline the world. Begins to develop "Egocentric speech"(Piaget J., Vygotsky LS, 1956). According to L.S. Vigotsky, one of its most important functions is planning. It is the possibility of planning - producing and holding a common sense perspective - in the future will give the child the opportunity to safely come out of the crisis of the first year.

Obviously, in this difficult moment of the development of the baby, the deduction of emotional relationship with it is close to the formation of egocentric speech is of great importance for the formation of egocentric speech. General with an adult comment in which they live are fixed, the impression of everyday life is presented in order, allows the child to feel its stability, reliability and predictability. At the same time, dangerous situations are indicated. Thus, the kid is gradually the ability to organize with meaningful together with adult rules: what can be done, and what is impossible, dangerous; What is "good", and what is "bad." "Good" now, not only because everyone loves, but also because he should rule, corresponding to the expectations of loved ones.

Development from the year to three years

The period of early childhood (beginning with the release of the first affective crisis and ending in the new crisis of 3 years of age) is one for the most intense and saturated periods of emotional development of the child. Traditionally, by this time, the achievements of the baby in the sensorotor sphere and the development of speech skills, but here, in accordance with our goals, we will consider how these conquests of the child are ensured by its promotion in affective development.

During this period, the child continues to actively master individual methods Affective organization of their relations with the world. It has already been said that the first task that stood in front of him when he learned himself to move in space, it was the establishment of its own remote safety in interaction with the environment. As long as the child began to actively move, these questions were within the competence of an adult, and in those minutes, when the kid had always left alone, he kept his instinctive sense of self-preservation - "The Sensitude of the Region". Possible bruises and falls at the time were rather connected not with negligence, but with the non-coordinated movements, then the closest actively encouraged the baby to allow any element of risk, helping him to sit out of the position, to break away from the support, overcome the rages and steps.

At the age of about a year, when the child turns out one on one with the exciting influence of the sensor field, it temporarily loses not only the feeling of danger, but also the possibility of preserving its more or less meaningful behavior line. Baby becomes careless, he may not looking somewhere, by? Walking to try to stick your finger in a socket, although it already knows that it is impossible "bobo", runs after all that is moving, etc. That and the feeling of the edge, and the ability to hold the general meaning of what is happening to return to it.

In cooperation with loved ones, in "infection" his assessment of what is happening the child has their own emotional "tags" hazardous seatsWith which he gradually begins to punctually follow, and he already warns mom about the hole on the road or reports that now he can be running without holding a handle. So the baby has the first ways to establish a distance with a possible danger.

The new level continues to develop and other details of a stable lifestyle. As follows from the above, under normal development, a one-year-old child has already formed a fairly developed affective stereotype of his life with a set of certain habits in domestic and game behavior and ways of emotional contact. This stereotype was created by his mother, he was constantly maintained and, despite the fact that the contribution of the baby in it was constantly increasing, there was their common heritage. The separation of permanent infant unity with the mother, an increasingly frequent stay of the kid one on one with a complicating surrounding world require a clearer and stable "markup" not only in relation to the danger, but also to pleasant, "good" repeating impressions. All sides of the life of the baby are noticeably enriched. Such an ordering of surrounding impressions is primarily carried out with the help of the word. Actually, for Mom, this ordering is an introduction to the life of a baby more and more names of objects and their properties. If the first words appearing in the area of \u200b\u200bthe year were mainly indicable, now it takes great importance to callingwhich always happens in an emotionally significant situation. It is important to notice that the word introduced in this way, the child usually repeats.

Therefore, streamlining goes under the sign "My" (although the baby can still not speak the first person for a long time). At this time, the child is determined and the permanent attributes of all its classes begin: the plate from which he eats; pajamas, pot, toy with which he sleeps; Blanket, a rug on the wall, etc. Begins the period of gathering, storage: the baby begins to collect toys in the box, he appears interest in small objects (buttons, pebbles, pencils, paper, leaflets), and he is especially interested when they are immediately many. The baby becomes the owner, and this is a vented and important period of affective development of the world around them.

Gradually, the child is formed a collection of sustainable signs himself. All the manifestations of "themselves in the world are becoming important, and the child of this age is particularly carefully monitored by their constancy. It is important to him regularity, repeatability of achievement and confirmation of its success. Just at this time, the baby tries to be the center of attention, sitting on the pot, and then with pride to demonstrate its contents; Begins to smoke with chalk or pencil, noting the resulting trail; Not only recognizes himself in the mirror, but also with pleasure experimenting with reflection, etc.

The kid has gradually folded complexes of sustainable signs surrounding. First of all, it is, of course, the world of things related to people - first with loved ones ("Mine bag", "Grandfather glasses", "Grandma's knitting needles", "dads"), then - with particularly striking (whistle of the policeman, driver etc.). And here the baby is trying to keep the "reliability" of the signs of the sign, following the preservation of the belonging of things, the attribute of the character, the usual ritual of treatment with each of the close.

Against the background of this approval of the constancy and reliability of the surrounding and the child in him, it begins to actively experiment with himself. Just at this time, being in the already well-established relationship with the environment, it makes reckless actions with his body, often really dangerous: the baby can, be carried away, stuff some kind of small object To my nose, pull the bag on your head, etc. For this time, experiments with a speech are also characteristic: for example, barely learned to speak, the child is trying to rhyme or comic to the wrapping of words. Now he starts and truly comprehensively use the toy, "removing" from the process of "communication" with her all of her possible properties and functional qualities. At the same time, the baby is very captured by the experience gained and fully immersed in their experience. For this time, it is characterized by a long breaking with the details of the designer, cubes, wheels, boxes, liners, pyramids, machine, wheelchairs, sand, water transfusion. At the same time, not only the functional meaning of the toy is significant, but also its "sensual texture"; A child can, for example, dive for a long time in the feeling of roughness or smoothness of its surface, follow the glare, etc.

At this age, among the impressions of the child, there is a significant place to occupy the impressions that are initially related to the vital significant sensations, which becomes possible just after observing during this period some weakening of the dependence on the "field" trends. This leads to a new increase in the attention of the baby to the sensations of his own body, to the games with self-adjustment. It is at this time that anxious mom's episodes of onanigation may appear, the ear of the ear, the navel, etc., in a prosperous setting, they will remain episodes, but in conditions of hospitalism, asthenization, protracted stress, etc. They can gain firmly.

In addition, the child now gets a great opportunity to realize the meaning of what is happening - "grab" an ethological sign of the situation. First of all, it concerns the restoration of the lost was his own feeling of danger, and the kid often feels even sharper than an adult. For example, it can feel as a threat to any hole, any impaired integrity of the subject (a hole in the sink, where the water flowing in front of the ball and so on). From here it becomes clear why at this time children are so sensitive to the wrong face, to the disproportion of the figure of a person; The kid has a clear fear of the mask or an old face.

Later, when a child can, together with adults, "put" is a concrete bright frightening impression in a holistic semantic context of the situation (and thus protect it), he begins to pronounce what is happening, marking him, acting from himself and confirming his security ( "Grandma Sta-a-Renkaya", "At the uncle's leg is a patient", "Now the whole dirty driver will run away"). Sometimes there are and attempts to a child directly oppose themselves: "Uncle has a leg hurts, and in Petit - no"What does not testify at all about the acts of the child, but rather about his desire to establish themselves in the awareness of its own security. That is why he is so readily responded to the comfort of mom in situations when it falls or hits ( "I almost fell", "" I looked - and everything went ").

The ability to sensitively to catch an ethological sign of the situation gives the baby at an early age and a lot of pleasure. On this, for example, one of the favorite children's games is based - the climbing in the "mink", that is, in any shelter: under the bush, in the box, under the table.

Again arises special attention To close, but it is already manifested in sufficiently diverse ways to express love and tenderness - in kisses, hugs, affectionate names.

At the same time, the child begins to pull to the peers, "infects" them from them, the running, in which he seeks to participate, getting a lot of pleasure from the general movement and tactile contacts. Individuals and attachments, the child still does not allocate (no wonder adults say: "Let's go to the kids"), the main thing is to be together a lot of children, movement, tactile contacts.

In cases where other exciting children are included in the game, associated, for example, with the "sand", water, with any type of design from cubes or children's mosaic, children most often play "next".

The study of sensual affective stereotype in relations with the world gives the child very clear, detailed guidelines in definition, fixation and recognition subsequently such categories as pleasant, joyful and scary. Usually, researchers of affective development pay the greatest attention to a three-year-old age - the new crisis period of the child's development. We want to emphasize the significance of the previous period that creates the main prerequisites for the jump in the development of an individual identity of the child. The impressions of the child in this age are firmly fixed in its affective memory and become the basis of an intuitive understanding of the meaning of what is happening (comfort or discomfort, stability, well-being, and danger, good taste and disgust, squeaming), which will be relevant for him all life. Everyone can make sure that by drawing attention to the brightness of recognition of the quality of impression when it coincides with children's memories.

The impressions for the study of their individual stereotype the child is gaining independently, but it can only organize them in the system only with the help of loved ones. He gladly listens to increasingly difficult stories about himself and everything that happens around, loves that there are multiple repetitions, often asking questions provoking them, and rejoices, having heard the expected response. The greatest pleasure of the baby delivers the organization, orderliness of his life himself? And his houses. To ensure that the child felt comfortable, the usual rituals accompanying awakening, a waste, reception, reception, fees for a walk, on the road, a walk, etc.

With the help of a thing that has become an obligatory attribute and turned out to be included in the ritual of interaction, the child masters new imitation forms. If earlier the baby involuntarily followed intonation, plastic, gestures, close, now he begins to sing mom, dad, herself, other loved ones, consciously depicting everyone with the help of the most characteristic of them, meaningful attributes (glasses, shoes, briefcase, tie and t . d.). Similarly, "work out" and attributes and other persons significant for a child - doctors, policeman, chauffeur, etc.

Another effective way to organize the impressions of the child at this time are the first children's books. Of course, already up to the year, the baby begins to listen to the first songs, fun, poems, view pictures in the book, but the impression of it is primarily the intonation of mom, the rhythm asked by verses, some plots of pictures that mom emotionally "loses" in front of the baby, involving it "To empathy" ( "The egg fell and broke. Grandfather crying: "A-A", Baba cries: "A-A-A" ...). The desire for such a rhythmic organization of impressions is kept in a child and then when he becomes older. In early age children, they are the success of those books that set rhythm, repeatability, brute force and the extent to detail of impressions like those specified in the famous "kolobok" and "Teremka". For the baby, it is valuable if this rhythm is set not only with words and rhymes, but also with illustrations. On preferred kid illustrations, not only the events occurring in the plot, but also carefully reproduced kits of those familiar things that the baby are well acquainted (for example, the famous illustrations of Y.Vasnetsov depicting items related to kitchen, nursery, with vegetable garden, garden , River, Middle Forest, etc.).

IV. The main stages of communicating with peers in early and preschool childhood The last question will be considered in the article relates to the genesis of communication of children with peers in the first seven years of life. The allocation of this aspect is due to the genetic nature

From the book a healthy and happy child. Let the duckling become a swan! Author Afonin Igor Nikolaevich

From the book Psychology: Crib Author author unknown

From the book of psycholinguistics Author Frumkina Rebekka Markovna

J. Piaget. Fragments from ch. V "The main characteristics of the baby's logic" Books "judgment and reasoning of the child" § 1. Egocentrism in the thinking of the child ... Logic activity is the process of evidence, search for truth. When we feel the need to verify correctness

From the book General Psychology Author Shishkoedov Pavel Nikolaevich

Chapter 2 The main historical stages of the development of psychology in the history of the development of psychology as science can be distinguished by two main stages. At the first stage (VI century BC - XIX century. N.E.) psychological knowledge developed in the framework of such sciences as philosophy and natural science. how

From the book, the psychology of deception [how, why and why even honest people are lying] by Ford Charles V.

Stages of development For this study, we divided the development of deception into three stages. Naturally, the boundaries between them are blurred. These are these three stages: 1) Early childhood, approximately 2 to 6 years; 2) Latent period, from 6 to 12 years; 3) Youth, from 12 to 18 years. When studying the process

From the Basics Book general psychology Author Rubinstein Sergey Leonidovich

The main stages of development of behavior and psyche; The problem of instinct, skill and intelligence under the behavior of course, in certainly organized activity, combining the body with the environment. While a person internal consciousness plan

From the book how to learn and not to get tired Author Makeev A. V.

The emergence and first stages of the development of the child's speech in the ontogenesis The emergence and development of speech can be the subject of direct observation of the psychologist. The child's development in the child is mediated by learning: the child learns to speak. However, this does not mean that

From the book Psychology of human development [the development of subjective reality in ontogenesis] Author Slobodchikov Viktor Ivanovich

From the book, psychological workshop for beginners Author Barlas Tatyana Vladimirovna

From the book Psychological Color and Picturesque tests for adults and children Author Shevchenko Margarita Aleksandrovna

The main stages of the task assignment included in the book are rather heterogeneous, but the sequence and execution plan are common to most of them (although not for all). Therefore, we list its main steps.1. The wording of the target and hypothesis. Goal -

From the book how to calmly talk to the child about life so that he will give you calmly live Author Makhovskaya Olga Ivanovna

The reflection of the emotional state of the child on preferred colors in the figure in the color figure of the child will always be praised by his mood and emotions. Hisua, the child already in 3-4 years old chooses the color that most accurately reflects his mental and emotional state.

From the book Perinatal Psychology Author Sidorov Pavel Ivanovich

Stages of psychosexual development of a child Where do boys and girls come from? This is the most hard question Education. Since religion always ranked him to sin, it is traditionally silent in the family, confuses the children, and parents. Is every secrets that we diligently

From the book Emotional Intellect. How Mind communicates with feelings by Lemberg Boris.

The main stages and maintenance of psychological counseling The first stage is the analysis of the complaint content. At this stage, mutual understanding is achieved. Stage duration up to 10 minutes, during which the psychologist structures the situation, determines the topic of interaction,

From the book of the author

Five key skills for the development of emotional intelligence When we talk about happiness and success in life, emotional intelligence means as much as intellectual ability. Emotional intelligence helps a person building a strong relationship, succeed

Early stages of emotional development

But the baby and at home, the parents take care of him and carefully and carefully, they are doing on a schedule, listen to the advice of doctors and senior, read books about the rules of care. Here are just a book about the spiritual, the emotional development of the baby they are rare. Yes, and why: if only it was, it was fed, I slept well, did not cry.

Crying is bad, it should be avoided, this is a signal that you need to change diapers, give a pacifier, etc. And whether parents are thinking about that crying is not only the inconvenience signal and discontent, and the call for communication is the very first language of the child, The form of manifestation of desire in understanding. Remember what you did when your baby started crying - did you take it on your arms and caressed, comforted or, following the strict regulations, they threw the diapers, followed independence in a separate bed to "not get used to the hands"? But the bodily chat was for the baby clear again when he was sitting in the tummy, and this is the closest form of relationships for him now with the surrounding tactile, bodily contacts. And how many of you talked with the baby, soothered, said that you love and understand him in the first days, weeks, months of his life? It is proved that the kids react differently to the voice of Mom, Pope, grandmothers, unfamiliar, of all they distinguish up to 30 voice shades and intonations. Communicating with each other is friendly, calm, you do not scare the baby, do not create soils for anxiety and fears. Rough conversations, discussion of their problems, clarifying relationships with baby internally bother him, strain, from here and crying "no visible reasons", sleepless nights. Dysfunctional relationships between parents have always been, there will be a cause of children's emotional problems.

Remember whether you have it, and if "yes", then this is another cause of your present misunderstanding of my child, this is a perplexity answer: "After all, we do everything for him, because we are good now."

A man in his life constantly loses something - things, time, opportunities, relationships, people. Probably there is not a single day when something would have been losing. And perhaps a single hour or even minutes. Loss is the norm of human life and, accordingly, there must be a kind of "normal" emotional response to the loss.

One of the first such emotional reactions to a serious loss was examined by the psychologist Elizabeth Kübler-Ros. She watched the response of deadly patients to his diagnosis and allocated five stages of experience:

1. denial. A person cannot believe in his diagnosis.

2. Aggression. Claims for doctors, anger on healthy people.

3. Bidding. Bidding with fate, "Ah if I ...".

4. Depression. Despair, loss of interest in life.

5. Adoption. "I lived not in vain and now I can die ...".

Later, this model was transferred to the experience of any loss, including the smallest. The passage of these five (six) stages is considered the "norm" of experiencing loss. The speed of their passage depends on the severity of the loss and on the level of "maturity" of the personality. The lighter loss, the faster they are experiencing. The "norm" for the most severe losses (for example, the loss of relatives) is no longer a year or two. On the contrary, the deviation from the norm can be considered the failure of these stages, hanging on any of them.

Some psychologists, this model was also supplemented with the sixth stage - "Development".

In this case, a person under loss passes certain stages, as a result of which his personality receives potential for development, becomes more mature. Or these stages may not be passed (there was freezing at a certain stage), and the development of the personality, on the contrary, it slowed down. Consequently, with such an addition, any loss can be viewed from a positive side - it is the potential of development. Not losing anything, the person cannot develop (it looks like the thesis of Soviet psychology "personality develops in conflict"). In the direction of psychotherapy, a transactional analysis is made to depict this model through the "Loss Loss", where the movement of a person through the passage of "loss loops" is clearly shown. Then, a person who has a violated cycle of experiencing losses, in which case is not just unable to worry and suffer because of this, and he has a blocked personality development so. Then, the private task of a psychologist will be assistance in experiencing losses, and the general - restoration of the passage cycle of losses as such (therefore, often, with a focus advisory request for the help of experiences, grief overlooks the psychotherapeutic request for uniforms of blocks and prohibitions in the emotional sphere).

The same model can be represented as a sequence of emotions that are experienced at each stage:

1. Fear;

2. Anger;

3. Wines;

4. Sadness;

5. Adoption;

6. Hope.

It is so convenient to explain the psychological function of each stage. In the "norm" a person with any loss is experiencing the sequence of these emotions.

1. Stage of fear.

Fear is protective emotion. He helps to predict and evaluate the threats, prepare for a meeting with them (or escape from them). People who have the experience of fear are not well developed or generally blocked, unable to adequately assess the threats and prepare for them. It is quite logical that nature was the first in the cycle of the loss of loss, it was the stage of fear - after all, it was here that the threat of further life from this loss and the search for its resources to survive. Respectively, the greatest difficulties With the experience of this stage there are people with disturbed ability to worry fear. In this case, a person responds to the loss of one or another level of its denial (from the neurotic feeling that nothing has happened, to the psychotic complete non-recognition of the loss). Also, instead of the prohibited true emotion of fear at this stage, scenario (recycled, black-made - terminology of transactional analysis) of emotions may occur. The task of the psychologist, when "jaming" at this stage, is assistance in the experience of fear of losses. In the consultative key, this is a search and filling of resources that will help live without a loss object (it is extremely recommended to "break denial", like this, for example, "love" to make inexperienced specialists in the case of dependencies - dependent because it denies its dependence, because that he has no resources live without it). In a psychotherapeutic key (at all other stages it is similar, so I will miss its description for other stages) - Working with blackmaged emotions, access to children's bans of fear and not enough resource parental figures (the child suffered empathy and protection in response to his fear emotions). As self-help, it is possible to write an essay "How I can live without ... (loss object)!", To conclude a contract to care for yourself, plan the search for supporting and "protecting" resources.

2. Stage of anger.

Anger is an emotion aimed at changing the world (situations). From this point of view, follow the stage of anger for the stage of fear, again is completely logical. At the previous stage, the threat and search for resources occurred. At this stage, an attempt is attempting to change the situation in its favor. After all, indeed, in many situations, it is not too late, the loss can be prevented by active actions (for example, to catch up with a pocket with the stealing of a wallet), and it is anger that it helps them. In addition, if fear helped estimate the level of threat to himself, the anger helps to appreciate what is unacceptable in the very situation that causes loss. Problems with the passage of this stage can be in people with the prohibited emotion of anger. Instead of the experience of natural anger, such people can "hang" in aggression, claims and accusations, as well as in the feeling of powerlessness and injustice. In addition, instead of the experience of true anger, blackmaged emotions can manifest. As at the stage of fear, the task of the psychologist in this case is help in experiencing anger and transition to the next step of experiencing loss. In the consultative key, it is the removal of culture prohibitions for anger (for example, it is impossible to be angry with the fact that a person died), the search for unacceptable in the situation of moments and the search for resources for the experience of anger to them. Self-help: "Letter of anger" (which I did not like in the situation that I am angry that I was unacceptable for me, etc. - It is important not to move on charges and aggression), "a letter of forgiveness."

3. Stage of guilt.

Wines - emotion that helps look for mistakes in his behavior and correct them. At this stage, wine helps a person to appreciate what could be done otherwise and:

1.) either to correct their behavior on time;

2.) Either draw conclusions for the future for such situations.

A person with an inability to adequate experiences of guilt can "hang" at this stage in self-evaluation, self-divisions and other auto-aggressive emotions. The principle of work of the psychologist here is similar to work at other stages. It is also important to teach a person to distinguish between the position of responsibility ("I am responsible for correcting / accepting my mistakes"), and guilt ("I have to be punished for my mistakes").

Self-help: Analysis of their mistakes, "An enlightenment letter" (which I did not like in my behavior, it is important not to move into an autoagression), "Letter for forgiveness", a contract for a new behavior in such situations in the future.

4. Stage of sadness.

The sadness performs the function of the gap of emotional bonds with the object of affection. During the problems of experiences, a person is unable to "release" loss and "hangs" in "depressive" emotions. Features of the psychologist at this stage: show the "regenerating" function of sad emotions. Self-help: Analysis of "+" of what they lost (as it was good with this / name / her), "Letter thanks" (where I remember and thanks for all the good things that were before with the object of loss, and without which it will now have to live) .

5. Stage of adoption.

The adoption performs the restore and search for resources for life without loss object. At the end of this stage, an emotional point is placed: "Yes, I can live without ...!". Features of the work of the psychologist: expansion of the prospects of time (translation from the past and present in the future), search for resources and replacing the loss object. Self-help: "Letter support yourself" (as I will live and maintain myself without a loss object).

6. Hope.

Hope is the emotion of development and aspiration forward. At this stage, the loss situation is translated into a resource situation. There is an understanding that there was actually in this loss and the acquisitions that can be used in the future. Psychologist's task: Assistance in finding acquisitions in a loss situation, as these resources can be used in the future. Self-help: Analysis of acquisitions in a loss situation, "Letter thanks Loss", setting goals for the future.

A more couple of words about the work of the psychologist with the experience of loss. Although this is a famous and common topic in the work of psychologists, there are moments that are rarely mentioned and many psychologists are missed by these moments. In the case of a prohibited by any true emotion (as already mentioned above), a person can experience blackmage emotion instead. So, for example, if the chant emotion of a true anger is wine (the child was taught to experience guilty for their anger), then in the second stage, instead of anger, the feeling of guilt will be activated. The psychologist in this case can make a mistake and take this stage for the third and assist in experiencing guilt, which in the end will be unsuccessful. While the work is necessary here just not to experience guilt, but on its removal, the subsequent unlocking of anger and help in the experience of it (anger). The same principle for other stages: important understanding, a person lacks resources for the experience of true emotion at this stage, or we are dealing with blackmaged emotions. True emotions must be helped to worry (in the best traditions of therapy), scenario "shoot" and identify the true true.

I would also like to recall once again that the losses are not only large, but also small daily. And a person can be unable to worry as well. As a result - negative emotional life background and blocked emotional development. In this case, the work of a psychologist will be to increase the emotional literacy and culture of a person (or how fashionably express today, emotional intelligence): explanations of the functions of emotions, the study of culture prohibitions, working with the system of emotional raceta and children's prohibitions, etc.

Well, the slogan finally: appreciate the loss, only in them we acquire!

To comprehend, work out and let go of psychological injuries of childhood.

Master effective methods Forgiveness and accepting yourself, getting rid of the emotional shipment of the past.

By improving your well-being, it is much happier and more successful.

Improve (or restore) relationships with loved ones.

Get a huge charge of energy to solve other personal problems.