How to find your way in life when "too many options"
Years after college, conducted in search of work, turned out to be severe for me. I tried to find myself at work on hiring, but in the very first month I was fired. Opened business, but lost thousands of dollars. She tried to cling for everything, but then challenged.
I did not know where I was going, as there were many opportunities. In this, by the way, the problem of most of us lies: when the number of options are unlimited, they do not move to a dead point, as you are lost, what choice is to do.
To finally figure out how to find your way in life, I performed several simple action. I advise you to repeat them to those who are now on the crossroads.
1. Learn all gradually on the Internet
On the Internet there are many educational platforms with lectures and practices. You can learn anything. Try everything in a row to understand what area you are interested. It is likely that you do not even guess that there is a matter of all your life simply because you have never been involved.
2. Go to events
Attend events that unite people in interest - professions or hobbies. Through an acquaintance with representatives of a certain sphere, you will learn that it represents something new for yourself.
3. Meet
Just get acquainted more often, everywhere. This is a great way to learn new people and make friends. Over time, you will understand what society you feel comfortable and where you have to communicate with people with the oil. Still learning a new one in a friendly environment much more efficiently than to study the subject alone.
4. Find Mentor
Try to find a mentor. It should be a person with a life or business experience, with certain knowledge in some sphere. Mentor will be able to direct you in the right direction and give an assessment from. Although, of course, the years may come to his searches. Or maybe he is somewhere nearby - you just need to look around.
5. Ask for help
Although family and friends are always under the side, for some reason, the idea that they can and need to seek support, does not always come to mind. Sometimes it is very shameful to confess to close people in the fact that you are bad, or about something to ask them. In fact, close to you only want the best, know you from and before and surely willingly provide any help. Including your strengths and weaknesses will be prompted.
6. Learn to listen
How many events you visit, no matter how many mentors would find, to build a qualitative relationship without the ability to listen. Although it seems obvious, many about it forget.
Listen when a friend or friend is told how they turn out to be moved along the career ladder. Listen to the speaker, whose history of success sounds from the scene. Everywhere you can find useful.
7. Learn to watch
You can learn from other people's mistakes. Sometimes it is enough to observe the actions of other people, notice their mistakes and finds and try to apply behavioral models in your life, which led them to success.
8. Set more questions
You can learn a lot, just asking questions. Soak the information as greedily like a sponge, and your knowledge luggage will be changed markedly. And this may be played key role When choosing your business.
"Any way is only one of the millions of possible ways"
Carlos Castaneda
Ways a great set ... what to choose? Speaking about the purpose and his search, it is impossible to go around the whole life path of man. This is a more capacious and long term concept of all human life. Someone lives on the inertia "Let everything goes as it goes," happy luck and upset when they bypass him, saying that this fate is so ... and someone is looking for the right path for himself. So what is preferred? Choosing a life path Or let your life on samonek?
Faced with the next failure in his life, probably, every person thought, and is it possible to change something at all? As a rule, all problems and consequences of errors we write off on fate. And I write every good luck to your account. But maybe, it is worth analyzing and fails? To see their mistakes, incorrect actions? Watch for children: one, stumbling on the stone, look at him, will make conclusions and will be in next time Go around the party, and the other will constantly fall in the same place. Such an infllent example can be put on a stencil on any deed of a person. And this is not the ability to think logically - this is, first of all, the desire to understand, "Why did I fall." It is unlikely that someone adult will seriously think that this stone put fate for him under his feet. And perhaps choosing a life path And it is to first learn to analyze, what consequences are coming as actions.
After all, few people think that life path of manFor which he goes, is not only the presence or lack of work, income, success. This is a worldview, and the ability to build harmonious relations both in the family and with business partners, the ability to rejoice and constructively be sad, the ability to live. Agree, our perception of everything that is happening depends on our attitude to the world. Can be created, but you can destroy everything . Obviously, these are two opposite poles, but the road between them is very short, as it depends only on our thoughts and feelings. And we can control these matters, well, or at least we can learn.
Do choosing a life path Alone, compare:
- Destruction - This is irritation, fear, longing, discontent with himself, disappointment, jealousy and even a sense of guilt, which entails punishment (himself). All this not only causes a person to destroy relationships, his life, but also himself, as thoughts and feelings have a property to materialize.
- Creation - This is responsible for your actions, feelings and thoughts. This understanding is that our own subconsciously controls life path of man. This is a road development.
Someone will say that the answer is obvious, but how to find yourselfyour way, not the principles of life, even making the right choosing a life path? After all, the feeling of unrealizations is also destructive power.
"Each of us has only one true vocation -
find the way to yourself "
Herman Hesse
Find yourself like It would not sound for skeptics, people sought at all times. But in the entire history of mankind no one has found a response to the question, how to find yourself, your own life path. A man always thinks over this, although it is difficult to solve the question to solve.
"Journey to a thousand miles begins from the first step"
Lao Tzu
As with the achievement of the goal, you need to be able to not only think / analyze / draw conclusions, but also to act. You have already done the first step - you decided that you need find yourself. how You will do it - this is another question.
"Or I will find my way, or I will put it myself"
F. Sydney
Find yourself - it means to feel yourself implemented, in demand and, as a result, happy. Comprehensive happiness for many is health, family and, of course, success in work - in a case that gives pleasure. That's the last component and is the most difficult for the majority: how to find yourself - His place in life, his calling, its business. Returning to the question of how to find your calling, it should be understood that no one can answer for him, but a number of specialists offer trainings and a variety of exercises that help to find tips, respondents in themselves what is really maybe will become your business Life.
How to make another step in searching for your vocation, your life path you will find in the next article in which we will talk about.
Human life is not just a biological phenomenon. This is an individual socio-historical fact. Because every living creature is growing and developing, but only a person is formed as a person with its worldview, values, claims and achievements, as well as a focus. And also, most importantly, with individual goals, plans, dreams and aspirations. Having achieved and living them, a person passes his own way in this world. But not everyone is just like that. Some do not even know how to find your way in life. And there are aimless. This topic is often considered by psychologists capable of their advice and recommendations to help people come to the goal of existence and find their way in life. That's what I would like to talk.
Beyond the way
At first I would like to note that the life of a person is customary to divide on five phases. Especially much attention paid for this german psychologist Carl Bücher. And the first phase, which lasts until 16-20 years, is outside the life path. Because this period precedes self-determination. At So. young man There is no completeness of opportunities, professions and access to all the chances to show themselves.
Second phase
It, as a rule, begins from 16-20 years and lasts up to 25-30. In this pretty long period of youth, man begins to try himself in different areas Activities, form connections with other people, even look for a couple. At this stage, self-determination begins.
This is a personality approval of individual positions in various situations, the formation of worldview and values, as well as a reference point for self-organization. Behind him, most often, there are hopes. In this case are associated with sketches of possible ways of life.
Barriers
At the second stage, many are confronted with confusion, uncertainty, fear and unknown. Often, fears are related to the fact that a person is aware of the responsibility that falls on his shoulders in connection with the vital choice made by them. After all, he determines social norms acceptable for itself, dominant benchmarks, crucial values \u200b\u200band much more. In many people, this period is delayed so much that they completely lose ideas about how to find their way in life, and there are aimlessly every day.
Problem of choice
If a person long time Stayed in a lost state and does not know what he wakes up daily, then you need to act. It is better to start with the definition of the model of its path.
"Life as creativity" - this option suits people, with inclinations to experiments. Those personalities who love to put experiments on their destiny. Their life paths seem to be non-standard people who are accustomed to the "ordinary" model. Which is called "Life according to the rules." This is the least successful model. Because a person oriented on it follows the rules that are established by society, authorities, conventional standards. He lives according to the principle "as accepted," and not how he wants. And when it comes to him and the feeling that he spent his years wasted, it becomes too late. And the bitterness of regret at such moments is incredible.
Some suitable option "Life as an achievement". Everyone who chooses him acts as a man who "has done itself." These are workaholics, pragmatics, careerists - all people considering the time for them as a valuable resource for implementation as possible more goals capable of providing a better life.
I would also like to note the attention as a model called "life against life." People following her are in a constant process of struggle. In the figurative sense of the word, of course. And most often the struggle is legally for social benefits.
Listen to desires
That's what you need to make a person first if he thinks about how to find a way to a new life. Desires is part of our nature. They are individual and changeable, each of their own. But they all are social. And desires, thanks to the conscious activities of a person and his thinking, sooner or later be rejected into some life goals. Which determine the meaning of existence.
The right path in the life of a person will be able to determine if he listens to himself. To what he wants. Strong desires are always becoming purposes, as they are a powerful stimulating energy for any human activity - whether creativity, business, or interpersonal relationships.
Absolutely every psychologist will say to his patient: "The path of your life is just your decision." And will be right. Only a person has the right to dispose of it. But still there is a lot primary recommendationswho are able to help deal with their aspirations and desires.
If a person really does not know what he wants, he needs to expand the scope of knowledge and a circle of interest. How? It is necessary to start trying something new, previously not fearful. Often the path of life of a person lies outside of his perception. And when he embraces his attention to those areas that were previously closed from him, he seemed to be starting to see his existence from another angle. There is an invaluable feeling of long-awaited certainty - a person, finally, finds what has long been looking for.
Psychologists are also recommended not to limit themselves. Some may assume that effective work It is possible only in one direction. Of course, there are such goals that require "complete immersion." But you do not need to spend everything yourself for its implementation. It is recommended to combine such a goal with other raising forces and time. As a rule, they are perfectly combined and harmonized.
Landmark for knowledge and opportunities
Find the beginning of the way in life a person will be easier if he analyzes himself as a source useful resources For his passage. What can he do? What actions are capable of committing? How far can go in pursuit of the meaning of life? Abilities play an important role in the process of passing the life path. After all, they are the properties of personalities that determine the successful implementation of one or another kind of activity.
Abilities - our internal mental regulators, which determine the possibility of acquiring skills, skills and knowledge. Some of them define the success of education and training, as well as the formation personal qualities. Others are responsible for producing new ideas, discoveries. Abilities - human resources that it must use in the name of achieving goals. Knowledge of their presence is often helping to find the path of spiritual life. You just need to ask yourself one question: "What is I able to?", And give answers to him. Perhaps in one of them will be hidden the meaning of life.
About values
Surely every person, taking congratulations in honor of this or that event, I heard in my address and this: "I wish you to find your way in life." Indeed, many are able to say that, but not everyone is given to support the choice of man. Because the conflict of values \u200b\u200bhas always had and will have a place to be.
And the life path is determined by them. Because a person can gain happiness only if there is something significant in its existence that can satisfy his diverse needs. And nothing else. A person for whom, priority significance has independence, absolute freedom and entertainment, will not be completely happy if he burden herself with his family, children and responsibility to them. And vice versa. The one who most dreams of a big friendly family will not gain happiness if it is a day to disappear at work.
So what are we talking about? The fact that, defining his life path, a person should navigate not only at desire and opportunities, but also on values. They are the component of his soul.
Forecasting
If a person does not know what he wants, and believes that he is in a hopeless position, then it is not. Just to solve the questions need to come from the other side. And answer yourself the following question: "What I don't want?" For him, as a rule, people find answers faster.
Only they must be specified. It is clear that the majority will answer: "I do not want to live my years aimlessly." But what exactly is invested in this statement? Everyone has something to go. Some do not want to be lonely in old age. Others do not wish to exist all their lives in the same city. For some, the worst fear is poverty and poverty. Another one is afraid to leave this light, without leaving anything after himself.
Options - thousands. But the essence is as follows: if there is not the slightest idea of \u200b\u200btheir desires, then you need to repel from the opposite.
Testing
It can really help some people who are puzzled by the question regarding how to find your way in life. Test of this kind can be found in free access. He is aimed at studying the needs of man and his motivation. All he needs is to give answers to already ready questions. Options are usually available. So it remains only to celebrate the most suitable and close to man.
As an example, you can bring a few questions from different blocks. The first is formulated as follows: "Time is money. We must strive to earn as much as possible. " The question from the second block sounds as follows: "Work is a forced vital necessity." Further, as a rule, there are questions aimed at identifying factors that take the most time, as well as to determine the predisposition to one or another areas of activity. For all questions, by the way, such options are offered: "I agree with this", "50 x 50" and "I do not think so."
Of course, after that, a person will not open the truth regarding how to find my way in life. The test, however, can push on reflections. And the results will prompt the direction in which it would be worth starting to act.
Self-realization
How to find your way in life? You need to do what it turns out best. Or what always wanted to try. At the same time it is necessary to throw away all doubts. Many precisely because of them bury their dreams and desires. But in vain. What to lose? No wonder they say - it is better to do and regret what to regret that he did not. Even if it does not work, a person will know what he tried.
After all, its potential is very important to implement. This is the basic necessity for each person. Even Abraham Harold Maslow Included self-realization into his famous need for needs. And Aristotle said that happiness can be achieved, only embodying his potential opportunities in reality.
But for this, a person needs to get rid of the word "need." Almost every second will say: "Yes, I would like to engage in music / choreography / sports / artistic / tourism, but all my time occupies work. I need to make money to live. " Yes, such is reality. Need money. But changes in life are also necessary! You can find another job that takes less time. Or even organize your business. Work that does not bring joy and satisfaction is an excellent reason for dismissal and subsequent business education. And this, in turn, is not only a useful case and personal source of income, but also a method of self-realization.
Awareness of freedom
That's what is really important. A person who is thinking about how to find the right path in life must first understand that it is absolutely free. And wave to do everything he wants.
But many people in life follow anything, but not to their desires. They listen to parents, the media are guided by conditional generally accepted regulations and laws, exist in accordance with the banal life model. As if they forget that the owners of their life are only they and no one else.
But freedom is available to everyone. The right to it is fixed even in the Constitution. Freedom is the ability of a person to live and act in accordance with personal goals and interests, guided by the knowledge of objective necessity. And in no case cannot be forgotten about it.
Rules to remember
How to find the right way in life? It is necessary to follow simple recommendations:
- Remember that it's never too late to change your life for the better.
- Do not forget that there are problems in all.
- Perceive failures and troubles as an opportunity to get experience.
- Regularly testing (provoke) new sensations.
- Do a favorite thing.
- Forget yourself in the past and love your "I" in the present.
- Pay attention to your skills, self-development and hobbies.
- Put a goal, and nothing to retreat from it.
And most importantly - remember that life is a number of effort. Finding a goal will be able to see and the road. And it will put an end to the wandering, will give strength for a confident move towards her.
It happens that the person at the end of life regrets that he spent his best years, burned talent to the ground, missed the opportunity to fulfill his dream. It seems that I didn't live my life at all, and someone else's alien. So that this does not happen, we offer some tips on how to find your way in life.
Listen to yourself
Many of us do irreparable mistakes, blindly following someone else's opinion. We learn where our parents want; Choosing a job that my spouse approves; We are engaged in the hobby that friends recommend. We are subconsciously afraid to make a mistake, impose responsibility for our actions on other people. As if those who advise do not know how to make mistakes. It is necessary to finally become bolder and listen to one's own opinion.
Only knowing their true needs can be understood how to find a way in life. To do this, try to question each Council of others. Do not ignore, namely, to question that later personally think about, weighing, understand independently that the Council is really useful. Even if the Council gives loving and a wise man, it is necessary to approach it all the same, and not follow blindly. This will teach you yourself to make decisions.
Start with small. Realize what exactly you want from life. If the alarming thoughts come about that life passes by, try to analyze the moment when it started. Perhaps you are not satisfied with the work, lifestyle, environment.
Remember your long-standing dreams, youthful hobbies. If you understand that this life does not coincide with the former aspirations, then it's time to change something immediately. It is important to understand in which direction I want to develop, what to achieve how to live.
Do not hold on to what makes you unhappy. For example, it is very difficult to abandon hateful work, if I spent many years on it. However, being honest with himself, you can take a solid decision to change the place of work.
Recommend your own abilities
Many people overestimate their life goals, and then all their lives fail and disappointing instead of successfully engaged in favorite business. This is due to the fact that a person is focused on choosing an activity not on its abilities and desires, but on someone else's experience, fashion and stereotypes.
Do not forget that it is better to be a good pottery than a bad lawyer. Especially if you consider that a good potter, cultivating in your skills, can receive much greater profit and social recognition than a lawyer with a bad reputation. Remember that success can be achieved only in your favorite business. Do not chase for prestige, and improve in activities suitable for you.
Do not be afraid to start life again
At a certain point, it may seem that it's too late to change anything in your life. After all, education has already been received, the work was found, the circle of communication is stable. And even if it does not suit all this, contradicts the nature of man - nothing to change anything.
This opinion is mistaken. It's never too late to start life again, gain new acquaintances, get a second education, to make a favorite thing. The main thing is desire and determination.
Be responsible
Do not forget that freedom is, first of all, responsibility. By independently choosing the path for which you wish to go, you will no longer be able to reproach someone else in your failures. It is important to understand that your life is in your hands. Awareness of this - one of important stages Transforming a man in the blacksmith of his own happiness.
Believe in yourself
In order to find a way to life and successfully follow the target target very important to believe in your strength. It is harder than it seems, since many of us from childhood have accustomed to occupy a passive position, wait for changes from the life and pleasant randomness, without abrupting active actions.
In order to get rid of the nest of its own complexes and insecurity, you need to learn how to think positively.
- Trust yourself. Please accept the fact that, deciding on a new life path, you will inevitably lose the old one. Avoid feelings of guilt because of this. Understand that this is not a loss, but getting rid of unnecessary.
- Respect yourself. Try to get rid of the internal prohibitions that you have on the way. Remember that you are worthy of happiness, and do not let others impose your opinion.
- Formulate your tasks positively. To achieve the best results, you need to have an action plan, instead of the burdensome "I have to" say myself: "I want." Such psychological reception Gives a sea of \u200b\u200benthusiasm and pushes to action.
Feeding to find your way, do not be afraid of new difficulties and be prepared to overcome new obstacles. The main thing is to clearly outline its goal and truly want change.
Instruction
List everything possible pathsthat you are offered. Make this exercise in writing. The longer the list will turn out, the more opportunities you have. Some ways impose the surrounding people. Some options appear thanks to sudden circumstances. There are still alternatives inspired by your own principles, dreams, targets. Iproke the list as carefully. Do not miss even those options that you do not quite like. In the process of analysis, they can push you unexpected. Therefore, write down absolutely everything. Recall those who were previously in your. What ways did they go on?
Analyze each way For remote from your purpose. Now you must appreciate all alternatives. Record all options on separate sheets of paper. Then cut these sheets on the strips - so that only one option is recorded on each strip. All strips on 3 groups are recorded. The 1st group should be options that directly lead to your goal, even if they like you. In the 2nd group, place the paths that you like most, but can lead away somewhere aside. These are the paths that you prefer, based on. For example, a friend or friend approves this choice. In the 3rd group, determine those options that are too far away from your purpose. There may be the paths that someone imposes to you from the side. You do not need to neglect them until you post them in a separate group.
Choose waywho harmonizes with your goal. In each group, select only one such way. You must appreciate all alternatives, given that in all directions you do not break. Watch this process as if by the part, as if you choose a choice for outsiders. Even in the 3rd group may turn out waywhere it is traced with your main goal.
Return from everyone for the final one. Now you have 3 ways, the best, taking into account the interests of all sides. Justify yourself for yourself which way You are closer. Do not worry about what other people will think. Imagine that you are the last on Earth and no one else, we all temporarily left for Mars. Depends on your choice further fate In total mankind.
Video on the topic
note
Related can insist on their version of your life. Do not be offended for them to this, treat with understanding. They just wish you live better than they managed to. But will you be happy, performing someone else? - Decide this question with your soul, to then do not regret the years spent.
When you speak closest about your choice, let you know that you had 3 main options. Thus, you will emphasize that the choice is consciously, after a deep analysis. At a minimum, you will be respected for what you took into account possible alternatives.
Sources:
- What is a life choice in 2019
Dante wrote: "Follow your own way, and let people say anything." Every person is defined over its way, to go on which he tells his sixth sense. Choose the correct way prompts intuition, and follow it or not - to solve you.
Instruction
It often happens that parents and acquaintances advise one thing, and the person acts in its own way. It would seem that the mind tells a logical decision, but a person does what he tells him. Unfortunately, it is not always possible to clearly understand that he tells the sixth sense. There are times when intuition stores deep silence, and all common thoughts disappeared from the head. In this case, if you are standing on races waye, and on your solution depends further development Events of your life, then you should not hurry and your intention, not having time to understand yourself.
Take a timeout and travel on a trip. An ideal place For your holiday and random on your own will be India. In this country spend special programs and seminars for everyone who wants to communicate with the ancient monks. With the help of the translator, you can ask for advice from them, talk about the place of a person in the world, its missions and tasks. You will be learned by meditation, in the course of which you can understand yourself and your desires.
Right way - this is waywhich you like and which you like. If you do anything, and you are delighted, therefore, you are on the right track. For example, you do not just like to sing, and this is perfect for you, it turns out that they prove numerous proposals on the work of the vocalist in local institutions. If you feel it is yours, you need to work even more to achieve great success. Do with the teacher, enter the prestigious educational establishments. The main thing is not to stop there, and then no one can surpass you.
Choose the correct way In life will help simply exercise. Take a piece of paper and draw for yourself the perfect picture of the future. For example, you sunbathe on the coast near your own cottage. Near the picture, write in two columns that you can and want to do and what you do not like and indifferently.
For example, you know how to cook, but you are horrified by the process of organizing and managing a culinary workshop. So you are not a manager, but a real business is a culinary. Then go are not on popular courses of entrepreneurship and management, but on inexpensive culinary courses. Becoming a chef of an expensive restaurant, you are not only able to "lend" a fortune to yourself, but you will do every day a loved one.
Video on the topic
Life Path - An invisible trajectory, in accordance with which the chain of certain events is drawn up, following one after another in a certain sequence. In a different way, he is called fate or share.
