There comes a time in every person's life when he some serious decision needs to be made, which can greatly change his fate. As a rule, if a person realizes the difficulty of his situation, then making such decisions is very difficult. It's easy to make fateful decisions when you don't think or when you don't understand what. What can a person who understands his situation and is faced with the need to make a difficult decision find support? I invite you to think with me about possible answers to this question.
Give yourself time
To make any decision you need time. And it’s good if we are for these purposes allocate it to ourselves. In the old days, sages could deliberately retire in order to better concentrate on some important issue. Now the pace of our lives is so great that stopping for a while and focusing on something important to ourselves is becoming increasingly difficult. And without this it is very difficult to make a decision. After all, it is so important to think, analyze your situation, find and be disappointed in certain solutions, reach a dead end, and then again look for a way out of it.
All of these are integral components of searching and making a decision. And if we do not give ourselves time, then decisions can be impulsive and thoughtless, based on a fleeting mood or...
Reliance on feelings Somehow it turns out that in difficult situations our . Or there are so many “smart” thoughts that you can get lost in them; or the wind begins to blow through your head and your mind refuses to work. In this case, relying on your own feelings can help. Only this should be relying not on momentary emotions (joy, anger, fear, etc.), but for deep feelings
that live in each of us. It is very easy for someone to hear the voice of these feelings within themselves, and they only need to listen to themselves, but for others it is completely unknown how to hear the wave of their feelings in the general noise enveloping the soul. I will share with you the advice of one of my friends, who told me how he does it. Personally, I really liked his advice. So, first you will need to find, where you can retire. Once you have done this, find something nearby that you can focus your attention on. It’s better if it’s some kind of shiny object (it’s easier to focus on this for a long time). Sit comfortably, fix your gaze on this object, and while sitting like this, begin to gradually listen to yourself. To do this, imagine that inside you there is emptiness, silence, nothing. Listen to this silence and emptiness. Don't let your thoughts distract you from this silence. And if thoughts distract you, then simply notice what they are about and let them go. Gradually, something will begin to appear in this emptiness. Notice what comes to the surface. These are the feelings we are looking for. They can appear in the form of images, vague premonitions, sensations in the body. As soon as you notice something in yourself, try to listen to it and give your experiences the opportunity to unfold.
This whole procedure can be figuratively represented as follows. You are walking through the forest and you need to go out onto the road along which cars drive. This road is far away. You are walking and behind the crunch of branches and leaves under your feet, you cannot hear in which direction this road is. You stop and freeze to listen where the road is. And you don’t hear it right away, but only after a short period of time, when the ear adjusts to silence and hearing becomes sharper. It’s the same with feelings. You need to stop first and stop everything internal work, and then listen to where the “sound of your feelings” comes from within you.
If you manage to hear the voice of your feelings, hear your true desires, then this can provide support and the direction in which you would like to move. And if such a general direction becomes clear, then making a decision turns out to be much easier (and sometimes it simply becomes self-evident).
Self-deception test
An important guideline when making a decision can be feeling of inner agreement. This feeling can appear in reverse form, in the form feelings, if you refuse a decision, or, on the contrary, internally insist on the need to make it. Usually this feeling is similar to some kind of internal discomfort, something gnawing inside and tormenting, as if you were betraying yourself. It is very important to ask yourself difficult situation: “Why am I here? Why should I do such and such? What is the meaning of my decision? If you don't know what decision to make, then it's worth asking yourself about the meaning of the situation in which you are forced to make a decision. Why did you end up in it? Why did you come to it? By finding answers to these questions, you can better understand why you find yourself in a decision-making or choice situation. And after that, you can ask yourself whether you are betraying what you came to this situation for, and yourself at the same time, by choosing this or that solution.
Fighting doubts
It must be said that doubts often arise when if the decision is made under pressure(internal or external). If the decision is hard-won and internally matured, then doubts and regrets do not arise. Well, if the choice has not yet matured internally, but it needs to be made as soon as possible, then confusion and a desire to find the “right” solution appear. In such a state, any choice will be wrong. Such a decision will always be followed by a trail of regrets and doubts. There is only one way out here - to think about what forces you right now (“as soon as possible”) to make a choice and make a decision. More precisely, what doesn’t suit you about it? And here it is better to think about what else can be done to remove this internal dissatisfaction without radically changing the situation.
Generally speaking, best advice here - don't put pressure on yourself. Don't force yourself to make a decision. Allow yourself not to accept it. Relax. Be like a samurai who, with an unshakable spirit, stands on the edge of a cliff and looks at the blue sky, enjoying its beauty. Take your time and allow yourself to look at the situation a little.
Acceptance of sacrifice
In any choice, in any decision you, one way or another, forced to give up something. There is something important and valuable that must be sacrificed by choosing one alternative or another. You should be prepared for this. In order to experience the victim more effectively (so to speak), it is necessary to approach it with the awareness of what exactly are you losing. When you clearly understand what you are giving up, then it is easier for you to survive the consequences of making such a difficult decision.
In order to better understand what you will have to give up, try to complete the following sentence within yourself: “I will never again...”. By talking inside yourself about everything that you have to part with, you can, on the one hand, better understand the importance of this or that alternative and, on the other hand, gain courage and willingness to take responsibility for the decision made. One way to help you accept this sacrifice is to realize what you are paying for in the form of the benefits you are giving up. This is your choice, and for every choice in life we must pay something and sacrifice something for the sake of something more valuable to us.
Final point
To give your decision more weight, you need to "pump him up with energy". How to do it? There are two options here. On the one hand, you can take one of the alternatives that you want to refuse and imagine the worst possible scenario. This can be done by saying to yourself the following words: “if I choose such and such, I will suffer from such and such all my life.” You can do it like this.
Or you can find the positive that is in the choice to which you are inclined, and keep it in your mind, in your imagination, keep it as a goal, as the lighthouse you want to lead your ship to. Can remember more often the good things you strive for, especially in moments of doubt and hesitation.
Our whole life is woven from many decisions that we make every minute. It happens every second, and even unconsciously. At some moments we think about how to make a decision, at other moments making a decision is required only to perform some actions that are familiar to us. But one way or another, in order to start doing something, you must first make a decision.
Did you know that there are a huge number of things, even life-changing ones, that you can achieve by thinking about it for just one minute. Just 60 seconds of our time.
Is 1 minute a lot or a little?
Perhaps some of you will smile now and think to yourself that this does not happen. And that serious and business people should weigh the pros and cons... Yes, I agree with this, although this already comes after you have decided to act in this direction.
Let's say you've been thinking about changing jobs for a month. So, sometimes, after gossip with colleagues or a meeting with a successful classmate who, in the same time as you, has achieved much more in his life. But then, under the pressure of everyday routine, this unclear desire completely disappears from your field of vision. And once again someday it will appear timidly and disappear just as strangely.
But you just need to distract yourself from all other matters at such a moment, concentrate, ask yourself a few serious questions and decide now and here: how much I want to leave this job. For those who have particular doubts, you can draw on a piece of paper or in your imagination the well-known “pluses and minuses” (the pluses are why I like all this and am happy with it, the minuses are all the things that make me unable to continue working here), We determine what is more and quickly make a decision.
Yes, I know, I know. Now say that if you hurry, you will make people laugh. Yes, this happens too. But you must clearly understand that almost any decision can be made in a minute. Almost anything. It is clear that not all. Here, too, the mind must be turned on.
Well, would you agree that such a non-trivial desire, how to become a millionaire, can be accepted in a minute? No, I hear it in the comments... I bet you, you can read about this in a very fascinating and interesting book"One Minute Millionaire" by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert Allen. A book about business, I think many will be interested in reading it. The authors claim that you can make the decision to become a millionaire in just a minute. Everything that follows is no longer relevant to making a decision. Do you agree?
And in our fairly common example of the desire to change jobs, there was simply not that minute of time to stop for a minute and make the right decision. You know, I had those too life situations when the decision had been brewing for a long time, but I didn’t dare because more pluses to make the decision that I needed. Until the moment when there were more minuses. Most likely, this is normal, and it is quite possible that if I had acted faster, I would not have missed so many opportunities.
The secret of successful people
Do you know the secret successful people, and why are they so much more effective in their lives than many of us? They just manage to do more in the same amount of time. And they don’t just manage to do more, but they manage to do more IMPORTANT things. Here's a simple secret. If we come to an agreement with ourselves and do one more important thing every day than the previous day, I assure you that our personal effectiveness will increase significantly in a short time.
This means that the next day we will have to spend not one minute making a decision, but two, since we also should have not one, but two tasks. It is clear that no one forces us to go on forever; nevertheless, all our affairs must first of all be brought to a logical result. But if you approach this moment wisely, then the main things will appear regardless of our participation with enviable regularity.
The most important thing: how to make a decision
And here I will give a few more interesting thoughts on how to make a choice.
heads or tails
You are walking along the seashore and notice a strangely shaped bottle half sticking out of the sand.
You pick it up and open it.
A light mist emanates from the bottle, which turns into a fairy-tale genie.
Unlike other genies, this one does not offer to grant you three wishes.
He gives you the right to choose.
Option one:
You will receive five extra years of life if another person, chosen at random, has their life shortened by five years.
Do you want to prolong your life under such conditions?
Option two:
You can get twenty thousand dollars if you agree to get a tattoo the size of a dollar bill.
Will you take this money?
If so, where will you place the tattoo and what design will you choose?
Option three:
When you wake up tomorrow morning, you will be able to acquire a new quality or skill.
What will you choose?
Not a bad test. And how many similar alternatives appear in our lives when you cannot decide what to do in a given situation. Experts advise developing your own system for evaluating options, which is based on many factors: logic, reason, practical experience, emotions, feelings.
The level of our intellectual form depends on how actively we participate at the moment of decision making. That's why it's so important to learn how to choose wisely. It’s not for nothing that they say: “You are what you choose.” By the way, this statement comes from management consultant John Arnold. The apt statement very quickly became an aphorism.
What do you need to do to make a decision?
Let's stop for a minute and find out the most important thing that will help us learn how to make the right decision:
1. These are truisms, my friends. I'm sure you know all this. In fact, you know all this, you just don’t apply it. The problem is that you still need to DO it. And if you do unusual things, it means that you need to leave your comfort zone. But this is already uncomfortable. Is it true? That's why Let's start and get out of our comfort zone.
If you don't know where you're going, it doesn't matter which path you choose.
Brothers Karamazov, outstanding jugglers
3. Defining the parameters, which our goals must correspond to. It is not difficult. Let’s ask ourselves just three important questions.
What do I want to receive?
What do I want to avoid?
4. We are looking for an alternative solution. We try to ensure that our requirements obtained by answering the listed questions themselves generate alternative solutions.
5. We evaluate and check the chosen solution. Here the queen is mathematics. We will have to compare according to criteria, parameters, technical specifications, degree of risk, size of resources, etc.
Quick decisions are not correct.
Sophocles, poet and playwrightHe who thinks too much does little.
Johann Friedrich Schiller, poet and playwright
6. Introducing the Consequences the decision we made. The most interesting point, in my opinion. It already depends on the power of our imagination. Under no circumstances should you consult with relatives, friends and neighbors at this stage. For them, you must always remain as you are. They will advise you...
7. Required we feel ourselves and our own intuition. We must try to choose correct option and make the right decision, that is, what we feel is right.
8. We make a decision and we are not afraid that we made the wrong choice. We also need mistakes, though not large quantities. Mistakes are experiences that will subsequently allow us to quickly evaluate the decision we make.
9. Once you have made a decision, you need to understand that will have to act in accordance with it.
I hear your indignant remarks: And all this can be done in a minute? Well, at first, it may not be possible to do it in a minute, but over time, the actions of our thought process will be brought to automaticity, and making decisions will become much easier than now. Well, then, no one is stopping you from developing your own decision-making methodology, I hope that you will definitely share it with us.
Make a decision in 1 minute
You can do a lot in one minute. You can just dream or regret. You can say “I quit,” you can say something important, or you can let something important happen through your silence. You can decide who you want to live with, what you want to do, whether you like doing it. In one minute you can determine your most important desire and understand why life is worth living. In one minute you can read this article and find out how to make a decision.
Find those things, those things, those tasks to start with that you can decide on in just 60 seconds. In just one minute of our time. Value your time and don’t do things that will make you regret the missed opportunities later. Let's act quickly!
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Many decisions in our lives have uncertain results. What to buy: a bike or a gym membership? Once you buy a bike, you can ride whenever and wherever you want. By purchasing a subscription, you can exercise on exercise equipment and swim in the pool. It seems that everything is clear, but why is it so difficult and sometimes even painful to make a decision?
The fact is that when we make a decision, for example, with two options, on the one hand we gain something, on the other we lose. Having bought a bicycle, we will not be able to go to the pool or exercise equipment. And after purchasing a subscription, we lose the opportunity to ride a bike in the evenings with friends and get a lot of fun associated with it.
Therefore, even when we make the right decision, as it seems to us, we experience pain. But in many cases the problem is far-fetched. For example, the torments of the morning choice - tea or coffee - are sucked out of thin air. Both options are good. You can drink tea, forget about coffee and get maximum pleasure. For some this is obvious, while others will have doubts and waste mental energy making choices where they shouldn’t be made. So, why is it sometimes not important what decision to make? Because it does not affect the quality of life and is unlikely to negatively affect the future. If you drink tea instead of coffee this morning, it doesn't make any difference ( possible harm Let's leave the coffee aside).
Therefore, the first thing to ask yourself is: is this really something important or can you choose one option at random and not worry? Many successful businessmen who make dozens of decisions a day know this, so they try to relieve themselves of the burden of everyday worries. They wear the same clothes and eat the same breakfast in the morning. An ordinary person brings himself to stress at the beginning of the day, because for him clothes and breakfast are of great importance. But actually it is not. Stop worrying about nonsense.
What really matters are the important decisions:
- Where to go to study?
- Which company should I go to work for?
- Which product should we start producing and which should we abandon?
- Do you need to learn Chinese?
- Which house should I buy?
- What skills to develop?
The consequences of these decisions are important. They allow you to lose or earn money, spoil or improve relationships with loved ones, and lead to growth or degradation.
Find out which issues are important to you and which are not. And then read on.
Decision making process
- Defining a problem, challenge or opportunity. Problem: which dentist to go to for dental treatment. Opportunity: What will be more important in five years - knowledge of English or Chinese?
- Creating an array of possible options. You can find several dental clinics on the Internet, and then also ask your friends.
- Assess the costs and benefits associated with each option. On the one hand, even treatment in an inexpensive clinic costs a pretty penny, on the other hand, you still need treatment, because then you will be forced to pay ten times more.
- Choosing a solution.
- Implementation of the selected solution.
- Assess the impact of the decision and change it if necessary.
You may not go through all six stages in every situation in your life, and not always in sequence. But even so, there shouldn’t be many difficulties in making decisions, because there are step-by-step algorithm. Although in life everything is usually not so simple. So what are the difficulties then?
Why is it sometimes so difficult to make a decision?
Some of your decisions are so simple that you make them without thinking. But complex or ambiguous ones require more attention. These include:
- Uncertainty: Many facts and variables may be unknown.
- Complexity: many interrelated factors.
- Consequences high risk : The impact of a decision on your destiny and the destiny of others can be significant.
- Alternatives: Various alternatives may arise, each with its own set of advantages, uncertainties and consequences.
- Interpersonal problems: You need to predict how other people will react to your decision.
All this flashes through your head in a second, so you don’t even have time to understand why this viscous inner feeling appeared. One thing is clear: the more complex the decision, the more time you need to allocate for thinking.
How to learn to make decisions
Before moving on to solving specific problematic issues, it is necessary to develop a general mechanism for making informed decisions. It consists of three parts:
- What you focus on. What you think shapes and changes you as a person. Many people focus every day on what they cannot control. You can make decisions based on what you have, what you can influence.
- Decide not to focus on what isn't working. It sounds strange, but this is what most people do. We are so accustomed to questioning everything that we don’t notice how, instead of working solutions, we first look at the ones that don’t work.
- Assess situations. Life changes every day, you, the people around you and situations in general change. Some problems may not be problems at all.
But this is all theory. IN real life We think in specific categories and are often limited in our choice by many factors. Here are some practical requirements to a process of reflection that will allow any situation to be considered more carefully and soberly.
Make a decision quickly
Yes, in this case it may not be the best. However, even a bad decision is better than deliberation that drags on for several days, months or years. During this time, people psychologically come to terms with the fact that they will not make any decision.
Successful, great people often make decisions quickly. They know that doubts and fears can ruin even the greatest endeavors. They change and adjust their plans along the way, learning as they go.
If you hate your job, why not decide right now to change it? Not to change, but to make a decision. This means you start looking for another job, improving your skills and preparing the ground. But you make a decision now, there is no need to delay.
We often think along the following chain: information collection - analysis - assessment - information collection - analysis - assessment. And so on ad infinitum. Make a decision (you already know that you need to change your hated job) right now and only after that look for information that will help in the process of implementing your plans.
The more you wait, the more you will suffer. Tormented by the fact that you perfectly understand the importance of making a decision, but you don’t make it.
Find the decision criterion
Should I take it? In many cases everything is too obvious, in others it is not. What are your criteria? For example:
- What's good for me.
- What is good for my loved ones.
- Something that will bring money.
- Something that will bring experience and knowledge.
After making a quick decision, collect information
Again: do not confuse and swap the first and third points. If you need to study, make a decision here and now, and only then start collecting information, looking for books, signing up for tutorials (all this can be done a minute later).
When the decision has been made and the goal has been set, collect all the necessary information, having previously set a condition for yourself: I will take the next important step in this direction in so much time. For example, you decide to study English language in the morning, we gave ourselves four hours to search for all the necessary information, and at six o’clock in the evening we decided to call several English schools and choose the best one for ourselves in terms of class time, distance, etc.
Analyze past decisions
It is important to understand two things:
- Why have you made good decisions in the past?
- Why have you made bad decisions in the past?
What happened then? What principles did you follow? Perhaps when you make decisions quickly and intuitively, they turn out to be the best ones of your life. Then do the same in the future.
Create a spreadsheet
It's very simple, visual and effective: all your choices on one screen with their ratings, pros and cons. This allows you to dive into details or look at big picture- depending on the purpose.
Tony Robbins method
Avoiding possible weaknesses in decision making can be done when you have a system in place to help you break down your options and anticipate potential weaknesses. It's called OOC/EMR. This is the decision making method from Tony Robbins. He applies four rules to the very process of its development.
Rule one: all important or difficult decisions must be made on paper.
Don't do it in your head. So you end up obsessing over the same things without getting to any resolution. Overthinking creates pressure and leads to stress.
Remember for yourself when last time It took us a long time to make an important decision. Or rather, they didn’t want to accept him. Months and even years passed, but the matter did not move forward. If you took pen and paper, the decision could be made in one hour.
Rule two: be absolutely clear about what you need, why you want it and how you will know that you have achieved it.
You must clearly understand what you want, what the goal is. Even if it is absolutely clear what exactly you want, you may forget the reasons why you want it. WHY is what will make you stick to your decision. This is where .
Get as specific as possible about what you want, why you need it, and how you will know when you get what you need.
Rule Three: Decisions are based on probability.
Don't expect complete and absolute certainty. In most cases you will never get it. Which means they have to give it to themselves.
No one can clearly say what the consequences of a decision will be. Yes, you need to collect information and analyze it, but no one can give a 100% guarantee.
Rule four: decision making is clarification.
In most cases there will be more than one result. Find out which decision will bring the most benefit in all areas of your life. Sometimes benefits arise where you never thought possible.
Now we have reached the decision-making process. Robbins calls it by the fancy acronym OOC/EMR. It consists of the following steps:
- Results.
- Choices.
- Consequences.
- Evaluation of options.
- Damage reduction.
- Solution.
Let's look at each step separately.
results
Tony Robbins starts by defining the results he wants to achieve. He asks the following questions:
- What will be the results?
- What exactly do I want to achieve?
This helps create clarity around deliverables as well as prioritization. After all, there can be a lot of them, and they can have completely different benefits.
Robbins: “Thinking first and then answering.”
Choices
He writes down all the options, even those that may seem strange. Why? Tony says there is a principle here: “One option is not a choice. Two options - a dilemma. Three options - a choice."
It doesn't matter if you like these particular options, just write them down.
Consequences
Robbins tries to figure out the consequences of each of the options he comes up with, and asks the following questions for each:
- What are the advantages and disadvantages of each option?
- What do I get from each option?
- What will it cost me?
Evaluating Options
For each option or choice, Tony Robbins asks the following questions:
- What outcomes are affected? (this is what we discussed in the first point)
- How critical are the disadvantages and how important are the advantages on a scale from 1 to 10?
- What is the probability from 0 to 100% that a negative or positive consequence will occur?
- What emotional benefit or consequence will occur if I choose this option?
Robbins uses this step to eliminate some options from the list.
Damage Reduction
He then considers the consequences of the disadvantages of each of the remaining options. For each, Tony Robbins brainstorms alternative ways to eliminate or reduce the damage.
You may be leaning towards one option, but know there are downsides to it. That's what this stage is for: think about how to reduce their influence.
Solution
Robbins selects the option that provides the greatest certainty of achieving the desired outcomes and needs based on the most likely consequences.
He suggests the following steps at this stage:
- Choose the best option.
- Supplement it to ensure it works.
- Decide for yourself that regardless of whether the option works 100% or not, it will lead to victory (this way you can stop being tormented by the thoughts that by choosing one option, we will lose the other).
- Develop a plan for implementation.
- Take action.
Books
You are unlikely to learn how to make decisions by learning a couple of methods. This is a process that takes years. The following books will help speed it up.
- “Problem Solving Using Intelligence Techniques” by Morgan Jones.
- "Refraction. The science of seeing differently" Bo Lotto.
- "A Guide to Lies. Critical thinking in the era of post-truth" Daniel Levitin.
- “How not to make mistakes. The Power of Mathematical Thinking by Jordan Ellenberg.
- “Why are we wrong? Thinking Traps in Action Joseph Hallinan.
- “Thinking traps. How to make decisions you won't regret." Chip Heath and Dan Heath.
- “Territory of delusions. What mistakes do smart people make? Rolf Dobelli.
- “Proactive thinking. How simple questions can dramatically change your work and life." John Miller.
- “Mental Traps at Work” by Mark Goulston.
This article sheds light on only part of such a complex process as decision making. You can learn more about it in our free course “”.
We make decisions all the time. Sometimes more than a hundred of them can accumulate in a day, and all of them will have one or another consequences. This means only one thing: the quality of decisions determines the quality of our lives. When you achieve mastery in this matter, you will achieve success in many areas. We wish you good luck!
NATA KARLINA person, being at a crossroads when making an important decision, is guided by two extremes - good and bad. What comes after we do or don't do something important? Will it be the end of the world or will peace and harmony reign? Why do we go to extremes? Is there really no middle ground?
WITH early age, every person regularly faces a choice:
Should I wear pants or a skirt today?
with a handsome guy or spend an evening with a smart and interesting admirer?
Should I go to college as a vocation or should I listen to my parents in choosing a profession?
Want to get an interesting or profitable job?
You can continue endlessly! How difficult it is to make the right decision when the choice concerns such serious things as the choice of profession or workplace.
There are people in the world who do not doubt the correctness decision taken. One can only envy them.
Fatalists don't give a damn.
This category of people involuntarily. They do not torment themselves with choice, they go with the flow in the direction where the “finger of fate” points. It’s easier for them to reach out, take out what they’re grabbing from the closet, and put it on without thinking. Go on a date with whoever calls first. Go to study at the institute that... Whatever job comes up first, you will stay in that one for the rest of your life. And, in their own way, they are absolutely right! Why torment yourself with unnecessary doubts if life itself will put everything in its place?
Intuition.
There is another category of people who never doubt the correctness of their choice. These are individuals with developed. Or those who believe that they have this feeling. They never doubt the correctness of the decision made. After all, the confidence that intuition will not let them down will not leave them.
But such people are in the minority; the rest are tormented, tormented and doubtful.
When you doubt the correctness of a decision, the “Descartes square” will help
What does a person rely on when he doesn’t know what to do correctly in a given situation?
It is possible to calculate the development of events down to the smallest detail only if you use the theory of probability. And then the value will be very approximate. However, few of us know how to do this. Therefore, by trusting to chance, you can achieve better results than those when a person intends to “swim against the tide” only in order to prove that the decision was correct.
To learn how to correctly assess the current problem and take the decisive step, use the “Descartes square”.
There are many ways that can show the pros and cons of a decision. For example, you can divide a sheet of paper into two parts. In the first column, write down the advantages that you will gain as a result of the decision made. The second is the cons.
Most effective method is considered to be “Descartes square”. Now the sheet of paper is divided into four parts, each of which contains a question that requires a detailed answer:
Positive aspects of getting what you want. (What awaits if you accomplish what you planned);
Positive aspects of not getting what you want. (What awaits if you don’t accomplish what you planned);
Negative aspects of wish fulfillment. (What can be avoided if you get what you want);
Negative aspects of not achieving what you want. (What can be avoided if you don’t get what you want).
Answering in each square questions asked, you will quickly come to the right decision. Here you need to evaluate and weigh all the pros and cons that may arise as a result of your decision, and make the only correct one.
What influences the search for the right solution?
What is the right decision? This is the distance between the starting point (task) and the point at which a person will receive satisfaction of his needs and plans (solution). This process involves all components of a person’s personality: mind, will, character and motivation. All this both helps and hinders the right decisions. Assess yourself, try to remember what exactly motivates you at that moment when you need to mobilize all your efforts to concentrate on one task. Sweep away the unnecessary and remove the unnecessary from yourself.
Confirmation.
When searching for the right solution, a person weighs all the components of the expected success. Choose based on the facts, do not be guided by speculation and illusory “what if.” Ignore information that you consider contradictory, look for a rational grain.
Subsequence.
Every action you take to solve a problem must be consistent.
The vector of thinking about the problem should be directed to one point. Take the shortest route, without being distracted by lyrical digressions from the topic.
Mobility.
This refers to a person’s ability to respond to a changing situation. With the emergence of new facts that contradict the decision you have chosen, you should adequately assess the situation and take appropriate measures.
Concentration.
When making a decision that is important to you, it is advisable to abstract yourself from other problems. Brain efforts need to be directed to a specific task, the completion of which depends on peace of mind, material well-being or the future in general.
Selectivity.
Choose facts that are truly noteworthy. Discard unnecessary information, do not consider important what is not worth your attention and effort.
Life experience.
When making serious decisions, you should not rely only on your own experience. Consult with smart people, watch shows, look for advice on the Internet or books.
Don't put your abilities first. The successes you have achieved before are a combination of your contribution, the help of others and a happy coincidence of circumstances. Draw conclusions from mistakes, try not to “step on the same rake” in the future.
Concentrate, choose the path you will take to make a decision, calm down and act. In the matter of awareness and development of an action plan, there should not be excessive haste, fanaticism and inflated forecasts about the result. These moments reduce the effectiveness of the process and give victory a bitter taste of dissatisfaction.
3 strategies will help you not doubt your decision
The method of Canadian professor Henry Mintzberg will help you make the right decision. In his opinion, there are three steps to success:
Action.
This process means you don't have time to think. There is a category of decision making that implies that there is simply no time to think. We must act immediately. Then the attitudes laid down by the instinct of self-preservation, personal experience and the mistakes of other people come into force. To properly evaluate such situations, learn to learn from everything that life throws at you. In a specific situation it often saves.
The process of thinking about a situation for a long time is inherent in representatives of Western culture. It implies an algorithm of the following actions:
And the formulation of the problem;
Systematization of the received data;
Direction adjustment;
Assessment of parameters influencing the result and choice necessary funds For ;
Search alternative solutions and options for the development of events;
Assessment of possible outcomes of events;
Decision and action.
Intuition.
People who make decisions on an intuitive level are guided by intuition, which they themselves characterize as a kind of “insight” that came suddenly. It happens that a person for a long time is looking for an answer to a specific question that haunts him. He falls asleep and wakes up with this thought. One fine day, he realizes that there is no problem at all, the solution is already in his head. In the subconscious of every person there is a hidden system of knowledge and life experience. At a critical moment, all body processes are activated, which allows you to quickly navigate the current situation.
There are four stages of decision making on an intuitive level:
Identifying the problem and collecting information about it. This process involves thinking, the emotional aspect, personal experience and environmental influences;
Concentrating all mental functions on understanding the problem in order to feel the depth and possibility of its solution;
Insight (illumination), which replaces reflection;
Double-checking the facts comparative analysis results of developments and final adjustments.
How to make a decision and no longer doubt
So, what is considered the most important factor for good decision making? Of course, there is enough time to think, systematize factors, find the right course of action and choose one solution from several possible ones. To learn how to make decisions you will never regret, use the following tips:
Time and place.
Don't act spontaneously in acceptance important steps. Schedule time when you can be alone.
If you wake up the next morning feeling relieved, go for it! If not, then the solution is not correct, or not the only correct one.
Making a fateful decision. You get the feeling that there is a wall in front of you, against which you have rested your forehead, and there is no further passage. Step away from the problem for a while. For example, go to the cinema to dispel. Distract your brain from the load that forces it to work under time pressure. But as soon as you feel that the feeling of heaviness in your soul has passed, return to the problem with renewed vigor.
Important and necessary.
Think about the necessity of what you are doing now. Is this really of such value to you that it’s worth the effort and nerves? If you are on the right path, then doubts about the need to solve this problem should be dismissed. If not, then you must clearly decide for yourself what benefit is driving you.
Having made a preliminary decision, do not rush to act. Once again, evaluate the options for the development of events, compare them with previous experience, remember the mistakes of your friends, and only then proceed to implement the planned plan.
The moment you realize that your decision is the only possible and correct one, you will feel relief. Now everything has fallen into place. It’s easier for you, but you have to act strictly according to plan. Do not forget that the result you want to achieve depends on the accuracy of the sequence of actions.
February 24, 2014To make the right decision, you don't have to spend a lot of time thinking about it, says time management expert Elizabeth Grace Sanders. Here are the methods she recommends.
First, you need to set yourself up for successful decision making. This process consists of three stages.
Take time to think
Of course you don't have time. But if you are pressed by a lack of time, then this is a signal that you should reconsider planning your daily tasks in general. Paradoxically, to make decisions quickly, you need to set aside time for this. Decision making is a task that requires much more attention than you can usually give when you wake up in the middle of the night with the anxious thought of an urgent problem that you still haven't solved.
You may need to set aside as little as 30 minutes or an hour to think through small decisions. For more serious ones - a few hours over two or three weeks. No matter how much time you have to make a decision, it is important to mark it on your calendar and stick to your chosen schedule regularly.
Decide what decision you need to make
Before you make a decision, you need to understand the nature of the choice you are making. For example, if you are thinking about changing jobs, then such a decision will affect not only your work responsibilities, but also your commute to the office, your salary, your colleagues, and more. By identifying the key factors that will affect your decision, you will quickly understand whether you are truly happy with a particular choice (and why). Perhaps a proposal for new job sounds attractive, but you can't stand the two-hour commute every day.
Consider all your options
There is no need to limit your choice to just “yes” or “no”. Think things through before making decisions possible options- perhaps you will find some compromises and alternatives that you did not notice right away. It's also worth considering whether you need to make any decision at all. Sometimes you can just go with the flow without interfering.
These were the basic principles of decision making. Now let's move on to methods that will help you make choices faster. Each of them will suit different situations.
Rely on your principles
If you have principles that you try to live by, it will be easier for you to make difficult decisions. For example, you know you want to spend a certain amount of time with your family, or a basic level of debt that you do not want to exceed. When you need to make a decision about a business trip, getting a job with a long commute to the office, or a major purchase, you immediately understand that this or that decision will contradict your principles.
Talk through possible solutions
Some people find it helpful to voice all their decisions. If you are one of them, then you will be able to make a decision faster after discussing it. It is not necessary to talk about this with knowledgeable people. You just need a good listener who will let you speak. Most likely, by the end of your conversation, you will make your own decision, even if your interlocutor says almost nothing.
Listen to someone else's opinion
Sometimes you may actually need someone's advice. If you are going to do something that has never been done before, it is better to ask for advice from someone who has already been similar situation. If you are inclined to make one decision or another, then if you seek advice, you will be able to decide faster. But be careful - don't blindly follow any advice. A choice that may seem obvious to someone may not be suitable for you. If you don’t like what they advise you, you don’t need to agree and endure. One way or another, the conversation may push you to a better decision.
Try your solution
In some cases, you can test a solution before committing to it. For example, if you are offered to move to another city for work, you can first go there and assess the situation or communicate with future colleagues in advance. At such moments, you are going through a new experience, and your body tells you how comfortable you feel in an unfamiliar environment.
Listen to yourself
Sometimes we just can’t make a decision because the brain considers one option to be rational, but the heart says that another will be correct. In this case, it is worth thinking about what hopes you have. For example, you ask your mentor for advice - what do you hope he will tell you to do? If you want to flip a coin to make a decision, which side do you hope it lands on? We are not the most rational creatures. Sometimes the right thing to do is to listen to our own hopes, because sometimes they tell us what decision we really want to make.
Life is full difficult elections, but they don’t have to take up a ton of your time. Learn to make decisions quickly, but thoughtfully, so that you don’t have to regret them later.