Many wives (exactly like husbands) have no idea how to handle the spouse dependent on alcohol. Many are quietly suffering in the hope that a miracle will ever happen and the problem itself will dismiss. I'm sorry but no. Will not disperse. If you do nothing, nothing will change, it will even become much worse. Moreover, not only you, but also for all family members.
If an alcoholic recognizes the problem, asks for help and actively trying to fight dependence - of course, it deserves your support.
But if under the alcohol, the behavior of a person becomes cruel or dangerous if he does not care at all as he feels around him, this is a completely different story. Perhaps the case is not in alcohol, but in the man itself. And then, even the most desperate alcoholics happen the moments of enlightenment when they can be reached. It is during this period that you need to express your opinion and listen to the point of view of the spouse. Does he aware of what effect on him is alcohol? Does the danger of their behavior understand? Does he / she want to overcome alcohol addiction and live another life?
You must live better than live now by alcohol. If your spouse agrees with you - this is a good sign. If you both sincerely believe that help is needed - look for it, start solving problems.
How to live with an alcoholic
Here are some simple rules:
You and your children do not deserve life in a toxic environment. If the dependent person does not want to change - this is his choice. But you are worthy of the best. You can not change people against their will. If a person presents a threat to your security, you are better to be where you can feel protected.
Many alcoholics are much better manageed with their lives than they (and you!) Think. But staying in the house where their sober spouse always takes over all responsibility, allows an alcoholic to be in a state of serenity and inaction. This is a closed circle when the husband / wife is controlled and responsible for the actions of the "its" alcoholic.
You think that you thus "take care", but in fact you leave an alcoholic in the position of impotence and passivity. Leave him alone. Give him a chance to grow up.
If an alcoholic is an explicit threat to you and the safety of your child, leaving. So you will not only help him take responsibility for your actions, but also will seriously apply that the necessary changes have already begun.
Sometimes the idea of \u200b\u200bleaving the spouse "alone to think over your behavior" is the best solution that can help break the vicious circle. Do not worry: time care is not a divorce and not betrayal. But it can teach an alcoholic self content.
It is important to make a dependent person understand that from now on you are going to live with your own independent adult life. Naturally, you stay in touch and, if necessary, are always ready to come to help.
As in the case of treating any other dependence, it will take some time, perhaps months or even years. The duration of rehabilitation is highly dependent on the identity and nature of the alcoholic, from the decisions that he accepts.
Life with an alcoholic - what you do not need to do
Each person and every situation is unique, so there is no universal method. The fight against alcoholism is a long process: you need to learn how to adapt to change and be ready to change your point of view and your attitude.
Here are some things you need and who should not do. Read them several times or print.
Do not blame yourself
Alcoholics are often trying to shift responsibility for their behavior on other people or circumstances. As you are closer to all, you will be attacked especially often. Whenever your husband / wife tries to convince you that uses your fault - do not believe. All people have problems, but not all alcoholics. Alcoholism is a dependence. Perhaps your spouse is feeling a feeling of guilt, he is bad. Shooting the guilt on you, he, thereby trying to find an excuse. This is his way to feel better.
Remember: if you do not force someone to drink, you are not responsible for drinking.
Do not cover
You may be ashamed of your spouse or a situation associated with drunkenness. But if you cover it or lie in his favor, you do not do it better and definitely do not help. In fact, this is denial of the problem. Alcoholism is your reality, be honest with you. Hiding the problem from the outside world, you create a "safe" bubble in which the alcoholic will continue to drink. Such behavior you only support drunkenness.
Do not try to control or treat
Surely you will have a temptation to try everything possible to prevent your wife / husband's alcohol. You may throw away or hide bottle, you may try to punish it somehow.
Important! Negative stimulation or punishment do not work. Worse, your partner is likely to feel upset, humiliated, lonely, offended and angry. All this is an extra reason for drinking.
In addition, you need to know that the effects of abolition of alcohol after heavy swallows can be extremely dangerous, so never attempt to independently bring your spouse through detoxification. It must be done in a medical situation.
Alcoholism is a serious illness, and you cannot control it if your spouse does not want it. You can ask for help for yourself, but the alcoholic must decide himself, he wants to help him or not.
Do not allow unacceptable behavior
Under the influence of alcohol, people often make thoughtless actions. "Was drunk, I remember anything" is not an excuse. You must clearly show what behavior is unacceptable for you. Abusive behavior is unacceptable for both sober and drunk. Be hard. Otherwise, you yourself will not notice how you find yourself in humiliating, toxic relationships.
Do not allow you to drink!
It may seem amazing: how can I let the spouse drink, if I myself suffer from it? Most likely, this happens unconsciously. Here, for example, several ways:
- You turn away from the problem. If you do not raise alcoholism or accept his drunkenness as a given, you, thereby encouraging it silently.
- You hide the fact of drunkenness. Covering alcoholic problems of your spouse, you become an accomplice in his eyes. It may look strange, but he perceives it as a sign of understanding and approval.
- You are inferior. Never buy alcohol and / or do not drink with an alcoholic. Do not cover it. If he spoiled something, being drunk, albeit himself and copes. Otherwise, you take over all responsibility for the use and behavior of the drinking.
Life with an alcoholic - what to do?
Watch out
This is the most important thing - take care of yourself!
Do not let someone else's problem dominate your life, even if it concerns her husband / wife. Watch your physical and mental health. In addition, you can inspire your husband or wife to come similarly.
If your husband or wife inflicts emotional or physical harm to you or your children - it's time to leave. First of all, you should think about security.
Start living in the present
Once you married this beautiful person, and you continue to nostalgate for long-stayed golden days. But understand, it only distracts you from real life! You have a problem - here and now. Do not refuse your excellent memories, but also do not let them distract you from reality.
In the same way, it makes no sense to regret incorrectly made the choice of a spouse and lost life. Concentrate on what you can do - right here and now.
Act and everything will succeed!
Alcoholism is one of the most terrible problems of modernity. If a man suffers from this disease, negative consequences are always concerned and his family. A woman who lives with a drinking man is in chronic stress, especially if it is not inclined to degrade, that is, if she doesn't drink herself.
Over the years, the woman realizes that next to her is not the same person, but a person who gradually degrades. And you do not need to remember what kind of gentle and caring was your husband, until I started drinking. What you see in front of yourself is already a completely different person. Rather, not even a person, but an animal, who has only one instinct has been preserved - drink in the evening, to shave in the morning. Do not believe the promises of alcoholics. Alcoholics can not be interested in family problems, raising children, ensuring normal living conditions to their homeymen.
Of course, it is not always a dietary drunkenness that can be called alcoholism, but the slightest manifestation of the abstinence syndrome and the sharp change of a person when drinking alcoholic beverages should be alert.
It is necessary to immediately assimilate that alcoholism is not a bad habit, according to many men and their wives, and a serious chronic disease, and as any illness, requires focused treatment and passage of the rehabilitation course, preferably under the supervision of a specialist. And then comes a long and difficult period in trying to forget what alcohol, where he is taken, why he wants to drink.
When in the family, the husband is an alcoholic, then the state of his wife is characterized by a dual experience: on the one hand, a woman understands his need for help with her husband, and on the other hand, she begins to think: to get away from her husband or continue to live with him?
Women who remain to live with an alcoholic husband can be divided into the following types:
1) Wife - Masochist. Such a woman in nature loves to suffer, suffer. Then she easier to justify his failures in his eyes. Such a woman will forever look for an answer to the question "What if the husband is an alcoholic" and for nothing will dispel with his pink glasses, will not admit the fact that her husband is an alcoholic. She will take it to the latter that the spouse is just an unsuccessful period in life.
2) Wife is a slave. She demolines everything unquestionably: drinking, insults, sometimes even beatings. With such a wife, there is no need to be corrected and so erased.
3) Wife - Sister of Mercy. She will suffer all her life, but to live with his spouse from a sense of duty, trying to help a person to the last. After all, such a woman believes that only she is a restraining factor for her husband, and if she leaves him, he rolled on the bottom. Sometimes such wives even begin to drink with his spouse "for the company", and after no longer stop.
4) indifferent wife. She has already humbled with the state of her husband. They are united only past and children. She lives by itself, he in itself. From this man begins to drink even more, finding a kind of mutual understanding in the company of drinking companions.
5) Wife - Tiran. She suppresses, imposes his will. For this uses the entire arsenal methods: scandals, silence, cold views, mockery, irony, criticism. A man next to such a woman himself begins to drink. A companion company becomes the place where the husband can at least feel like a man.
Tips, how to live with an alcoholic husband, for women who decided to stay with him:
At first it is worth thinking why a man drinks. After all, not every husband drunkard becomes so overnight. Right in possible reasons: genes, work, friends or something else. More often an explanation of the reasons are found in the outside world. A very rare woman is beginning to look for reasons ... in itself. This approach is absolutely opposite to the traditional understanding of the essence of the question when it is required to prove that the husband drinks. Of course, no alcoholic wife wanted to see his spouse who drinks, each tries to be the best wife in the world. And therefore, rarely, who admits that it she pulled the drunkard or his own behavior made him so.
If a person himself refuses to admit that he is an alcoholic, and personal responsibility for his behavior, it is not worth thinking about how to prove it. And even more so do not fight Alkash, all the time controlling his behavior. The struggle only aggravates the situation. Be bolder and admit responsibility: not in what is to blame and cannot prove your husband that he behaves asocially, but in how such a person may be present nearby.
The sense of responsibility and guilt is not the same thing. It does not mean that you need to immediately begin to accuse yourself in what is happening, recognizing your responsibility. Often, the wives of alcoholics and the head can not come that the woman does not like himself and does not adopt in the global sense that this most causes aggression on the subconscious level.
If there is an intention to save the family, but at the same time there is no strength to endure the drunkenness of her husband, try to present his illness in a different light. Alcohol only helps him soften the wounds in the soul. Therefore, it is not suitable for any means. Try to rephrase the essence of things: it is necessary to treat a injured soul, and not a consequence of this injury - alcoholism. Think what emotional state is the husband using alcohol? What he lacks: manifestations of their qualities of the leader, signs of attention, courage or affection. Analyze how this psychological state can be given to him, so the desired, but without the adoption of alcohol. If necessary, you can resort to the help of a family psychologist.
It makes no sense to talk with a dependent spouse, if he appeared home in a state of intoxication, as she probably will not understand the meaning of words addressed to him.
A person is not responsible for his actions and emotions, being in a state of changed consciousness under the influence of psychoactive substances. A person is unpredictable in behavior when he is drunk, so it's better not to provoke him. Drunk indifferently, who stands in front of him: a wife or someone else, a conversation with drunk can end and not started.
Some wives are trying to start a conversation the next day when the hangover comes in Alcash. We should not forget that at such a moment it becomes bad physically and morally, because he begins to feel guilty. This conversation can lead to the most unpredictable consequences.
Some begin to behave aggressively and attack the interlocutor to muffle the emergence of guilt. Others become "silk" and are ready to agree with all that they will say. And each time in copended relative believes these promises. Although they are performed very rarely, when the hangover is given in the situation, and then they are forgotten.
Understand how long the husband is sincere in his recognition and desire to be treated, easy. Requiring him a promise to "take up the mind", "think about behavior", "tie", not worth thinking about the truthfulness of his words. Better not bag to visit narcologist. And when the dependent is a lot of excuses, or he asks to transfer a visit, or declares that it will develop the power of will, it means that his recognition was most likely a trick that the closest left him alone for a while.
Recognition is not so easy to achieve, usually dependent is trying to leave the conversations about the problem he has. Discarding her existence, he does everything to avoid clarifying relationships.
Hanging labels on a drinking should not, as well as to evaluate its actions or scold it. Such tactics with alcoholics does not work, because the abuse of alcohol takes psychoactive substances not with the goal to make the life of loved ones worse, but because he has a dependence on them and he cannot do without them.
Better in conversation to demonstrate your feelings that you are afraid when we are waiting at night, for example. Or mention that the spouse is loved and you are not indifferent to what will happen to him.
It is necessary to reach those remnants of common sense that it may be still present. It is important to figure out the husband that he himself thinks about the whole situation, as far as he understands that he needs treatment and the degree of his willingness to adopt the proposed help from relatives.
If the situation has been increasing to such an extent that it is necessary to impose an ultimatum with a spouse who drinks, be prepared for what will have to embody them into reality. If you give a promise to not start your husband who returned drunk, the door should not be opened under any circumstances, even if there is a sense of inconvenience in front of the neighbors. If you are not ready to fulfill these requirements, it is better about them and not to declare. If one day you can not fulfill them and with the first violation, then the authority in the eyes of a funiferous relative will be lost forever. With patients with alcoholism, you need to be extremely honest, as any game or lies - promoting his asocial behavior.
But not everyone has enough patience. And many wives decide to break with such a life situation.
How to get away from the husband of an alcoholic.
This is a completely natural question for a woman who decided to leave the spouse, but does not understand how best to do it. First of all, it is necessary to enter clarity in relations with the spouse. Give it to understand that I was waiting for some changes on his part, but do not see another exit, except for divorce. Here you need to prepare for resistance.
A man can begging you to stay and promise what will exactly leave to drink. But to believe such promises would be wrong. Alcoholics are very dodging and go to everything to keep a person who can take money on alcohol. True, in some cases a man can take up the mind to try to return his beloved spouse. You should not answer his calls and agree to meetings. After your return, he can start drinking again. To give a spouse, one more chance is meaningless.
According to statistics, most women return to spouses to try to establish a joint life. But in the end everything is repeated first. After some time, the man goes back again, and a woman understands that he made a mistake. Some representatives of weak floor can not decide on a serious conversation or simply fear their husband-alcoholic.
If the situation has entered a dead end: just assemble things and leave the house until the spouse. He can leave a note with an explanation of your care. The phone number is desirable to change, as a former husband can look for you. Women are usually solved on such cardinal measures, the life of which with an alcoholic becomes a real torment. The behavior of a man can move all the borders. It is not worth thinking for a long time, doubt and lose precious time. A man can even quit drinking for a while, encoded, treated. But there is no guarantee that these measures will be enough to fully get rid of alcohol addiction. It is worth imagining what will happen to you and children if he is angry again? Such thoughts usually disrupt women and do not allow them to once again be mistaken in the former spouse.
New life without a husband and alcoholic should be started with a new circle of dating. It will not hurt to visit the Special Psychological Center to put in order nerves and communicate with interesting people - women having similar problems. It is very important to know that there are people who understand you and support.
It is impossible to afford to doubt the correctness of the decision taken, because it is necessary to start a new life without a ballast, which is a former husband-alcoholic. It is imbusably suffering because of this person, torture yourself and their children. If you felt the slightest uncertainty in the decision, change the place of residence so that the past is no longer invited to your life. Do not worry that you will be found forever. It is possible that a man will very soon bring a new passion and will spoil life only to her.
Women weakly believe in their strength, in what can live without once a loved one. But you will have to believe. It is necessary to focus on the positive sides of the new life. Now you can freely communicate with girlfriends, before which it used to be ashamed. You can also calmly raise and raise a child, meet relatives, relax and work. The moral liberation from the oppression of the former spouse is the beginning of the path to a new and happy life, where you will definitely wait for a new beautiful feeling.
Turn
Alcoholism more and more applied. The presence of a foul person in the family can lead to the appearance of the deepebility of other members. The atmosphere in the house becomes unfavorable, fear, hatred, anger appear. Is it possible to save the family and make an alcoholic throw drinking, how to behave if one of the members suffers from alcohol addiction? This is stated in our article.
And I like him! Even drinking
Many are interested, what women think about, contacting their lives with a man looking in a glass. Moreover, the latter often does not hide its addictions. What attracts in an alcoholic, is it possible to build a family with him? Woman can experience strong feelings for a man. He is exactly the one who she was looking for all his life, and his love for drinking at first is not perceived as something serious.
Psychologists explain why women love alcoholics. Drinking claims that they can break with their dependence at any moment. Drinking man is experiencing Euphoria, he cheer, laughs, joking, a woman likes such behavior. It happens that a man is closed in a sober state, silent, uncommunicable. But a glass of alcohol produces a magical effect on him.
Muscular tension is removed, gestures become softer, smooth, enveloping, sometimes unleashed, a man turns into a relaxed, gentle lover. Later, on the influence of alcohol, the deboschir can wake up in it, a confusion will appear, incoherent speech, but a short period of already drunk, but also an adequate man, bold and fun, really like women. There is a proverb: Drunk sleep, the fool is never. Unfortunately, the girls blindly follow her and waiting for the moment of enlightenment. Alcoholics sometimes position themselves as creative people, unrecognized artists, poets, musicians. The world is cruel, and nothing remains to be drunk.
Drins claim that they can break with their dependence at any moment
A woman begins to feel like a savior, tries to prove that not everything is lost and you can start a new life. She dreams about the moment when everything will work out, and the man will refuse alcohol. It is not known how much years will pass before she understands the futility of their efforts, aware of the disintegration of the person before the loved one, is aware that the thinking of an alcoholic is changing. Without the help of a competent specialist, it is not difficult to convince the alcoholic to be treated from alcoholism, but it is possible.
Learn to build your life
Alcoholism is a disease at which there is a change in the psyche of a person, alcohol destroys the personality. A person needs alcohol to feel good. And he is capable of any lie and meanness to get money on a bottle. He doesn't care who he deceives: an old mother, a wife, who considers the last penny, a child. He can pick up all the money from home, drink things. Later he will begin to repent and worry, swear, that it was the last time. It will be sincere, but is it possible to believe an alcoholic? Specialists respond negatively. Because everything will repeat again. On how to live with an alcoholic tips of the psychologist:
- Stop scolding a drunken husband, try to persuade alcoholic to go to bed. It's amazing that the wives begin to read the morality to the man in a half-conscious state. Often, morals cause aggression from her husband, and he begins to "educate" his wife, a scandal can turn into a fight.
- Pay attention to the weakest and unprotected family members to children. They suffer because of the painful addiction of one of the parent. We will have to learn to build relationships with them, try to fill their life with kindness and care. Walk in the park, a joint trip to the movies, the games in the fresh air will be able to rally the family. Let them remain bright memories of childhood. If the father does not be able to participate in joint activities for his state, do not focus on this. Sit in the cafe can be perfectly without it.
- No need to regret the drinking and buy alcohol to facilitate his condition, you will have to explain the alcoholic that it should solve my problems yourself.
- Refuse threats and intimidation. If a woman promises to divorce once at once, her words will not be perceived seriously.
- It is necessary to seek help from a specialist, narcologist and psychologist. It should be remembered that alcoholism is a disease, which means to treat it should doctors.
Convince the alcoholic to be treated from alcoholism difficult, but maybe
Right to the drinking
To conduct a conversation with an alcoholic, you will have to keep your emotions in the cord. Drunk can perceive anyone inadequately, even the most innocuous phrase. The hangover period is also not time for conversations for souls. A person is bad physically and morally from alcohol, he feels his guilt, and a conversation that enhances this feeling can lead to tragic consequences. Bunkering is useless, because he is also affected.
He drinks not from the feeling of revenge, not in order to punish his relatives, but because it cannot stop. Man is sick, and for cure it will take a lot of time and effort. It is necessary to try to reach a close person to see how adequate it is assessed by his state, is it ready to accept the help of loved ones and specialists. Conduct conversations with an alcoholic need a soft, even voice in a relaxed atmosphere.
Getting rid of Deliya
When a person uses alcohol-containing drinks for a long time, it develops delirium. The body temperature rises, the chills begins. All this is accompanied by hallucinations, delirium, as they speak in the people - the roof rides. In this state, a person is dangerous not only for others, but also for himself. Delica's precursors in the hollow period are vomiting, speech disorders, convulsions.
On white hot, so-called delirium, indicates the emerging unfortunate concern, the person ceases to navigate time and space. The sleep is broken, the patients are tormented by nightmares, then insomnia appears, accompanied by visual and voice hallucinations. The patient is experiencing a state of anxiety, which for a short time is replaced by calm. At first signs, the patient's delirium must be urgently hospitalized, he needs qualified therapeutic assistance.
Drinking rarely realizes that he is an alcoholic, he learned to deceive his loved ones, manipulate them. But relatives often do not want to admit that a person is seriously ill, and sometimes they do not know where to turn. Therefore, it is necessary to designate the problem and tell a drinking about the consequences of alcoholism, its influence not only for health, but also on the psychological climate in the family. After that, it is necessary to give hope for a cure and tell about effective ways to get rid of dependence. The smallest resistance occurs after the binge, so this is the most favorable moment, persuade to voluntarily visit the doctor or go to the clinic, where treatment will be appointed.
There are disposable methods of treating alcoholism and long-term programs. The first group includes coding, implantation of substances (fusion), stimulation.
These methods are inexpensive and do not require much time. Long-term programs imply individual and group psychotherapy. They require large investments of forces, emotions and cash, but very effective, taught patients to be happy without alcohol.
When drinking beloved spouse
Psychologists say that if in the family alcoholic, the joint accommodation with it is doomed. Specialists advise as soon as possible to divorce a husband and alcoholic. The desire to overcome alcoholism in the family, to be with her husband near the mountain and joy can negatively affect the psychological state of a woman, her health. If it is not possible to terminate the marriage, "psychological divorce" will help.
For this, it is necessary to perceive the spouse not as a loved one, but as a person of an outsider, a neighbor who lives with her in the same apartment. And although there will be drunkenness in the family, a woman will experience relief. We will go to the past experience and anxiety, a woman will deal with children and children will cease to arrange scandals, she will have their own interests. First of all, the alcoholic wife needs to learn to love themselves, and not live with a constant pain in the heart. Calm, balanced mother, even if there is a spidal husband, will be able to have a positive effect on children, because the consequences for the daughter of an alcoholic or his son are truly terrible.
Drinking husband is a mountain in the family. Only one who lived with an alcoholic itself can evaluate the entire scale of the tragedy, but even worse if the wife drinks. Women, as a rule, faster men become addicted. They cannot refuse alcohol. Realizing your destructive addiction, they try to break the vicious circle, but again they take a glass. Not always drinking woman asocial.
Often, only close to her destructive addiction know. For others, it remains a good specialist, a caring mother and wife. Society intolerabically refers to a drinking woman, and she hides his vice with all their might. A woman can not cope with the problem independently, and the fear of publicity keeps her from handling a specialist. For a child - a tragedy alcoholic mother. The causes of female alcoholism lies alone, dissatisfaction with life.
Lost alone with its dependence, the woman begins to drink more, becomes aggressive, hysterical. To help your beloved wife, you need to make a lot of effort, surround it with love, take care of depressions.
Do not drink, son, take a glass, daughter
There is nothing worse for the mother than to see that her baby drinks. Often a woman does not know how to do she, in vain trying to reach his child's consciousness. But she only gets promises to change or, even worse, hysterical. Drinking son or daughter bring unbearable mental suffering to parents, but with an alcoholic in the family you need to contact how to sick.
You need not to skip the moment when the child starts to regularly use alcohol, do not treat it as an error that is easy to fix. Scandals will not help solve the problem. The drinker itself is confident that he has good reasons for such behavior. It is important to know how to talk to an alcoholic, perhaps, just a conversation for souls will not help, the son or daughter will have to take to a psychologist. It is necessary to approach each case individually, but medical care is required if the brother began to abuse, it's time to sister to score alarm.
Mom and dad, do not drink!
Children in families where there are alcoholic parents are under constant psychological pressure. The child dreams of learning the parents of drinking, experiencing shame, he cannot invite friends to visit and feels like others, worse than his comrades from prosperous families. Such children grow early and try to deceive others, pretend that they are doing well. The daughter of an alcoholic looks sullen, scored, she shy his peers.
It is dangerous to remain in the family of alcoholics to the child, since those in inadequate condition can cause them psychological or physical injury. The child tries as his strength to change the situation that the day of day is becoming more and more difficult. Children cannot force parents to quit and suffer from it. Sometimes, without preparing unbearable conditions, run away from the house, or begin to steal, to bite, perform other illegal actions.
If the father is abusing, it means that children are deprived of moral and material support. The child should not grow with drinking parents.
And the public is obliged to be the first to score alarm. School teachers, cool leaders should be aware of how students live and first respond to an unfavorable environment in the family of their pupil. A man should understand that the father of an alcoholic loses his children forever.
In a situation where parents drink, the first thing you need to take care of the state of children and withdraw them from the family, providing favorable living conditions in the rehabilitation center. After that, there is a turn to think about parents. If they themselves can not realize the depth of their fall and will not pay for medical care, relatives should be made alcoholic treated. There are many examples when people stopped drinking alcohol. The seizure of children and the threat of deprivation of parental rights on many acts cut down.
Each person needs to know how not to become an alcoholic and accustom to the culture of drinking alcoholic beverages.
← Previous article Next article →Alcoholism is a trouble that often comes to a house to many. This is the Beach of our time. From this misfortune no one is insured. Alcoholism can go to chronic shape and cause dependence. And no social status, nor material condition can affect the development of this dependence. Alcoholism does not choose who stands in front of him. Most often, the alcohol addiction "instilling" in men. Main questions: "If a husband is an alcoholic, what to do a woman? Tips for whom to take? Where to run for help? Or part with him forever? How to behave in such a difficult life situation? From the torment you can get rid of? What do psychologists and doctors speak to this? ". Let's talk more thoroughly.
Feature of alcoholism
The addiction to alcohol in some people has been developed so much that the usual appearance of life breaks up and all the meaning in it. For avid alcoholics, the only goal in life is to find another dose of alcohol.
Doctors alcohol addiction equate to a complex pathological disease. Treatment is long. He treated independently drunking prevents "Lesakh" in the head, which again and again causes the unrestrained traction to continue to drink.
With alcoholism, a person completely loses self-control and becomes powerless before the bottle of vodka. Alcoholic is not able to adequately perceive the external environment. As a result, awareness of the problem in itself, which can lead to death, does not occur.
If the problem has passed into a chronic stage, then there is a small probability that a person will be able to stop himself. It is possible to get out of this deadly web in the event that you fully master information about the features of the disease and methods of treatment.
The first thing you need to know is alcohol is a unique poison that destroys all the internal organs of a person.
Secondly, alcoholism is a deadly disease that arises against the background of a systematic abuse of alcohol.
Alcoholism is a chronic disease that develops throughout life. If you identify the problem and begin treatment in the early stages, you can avoid heavy complications and fully cure.
If a person speaks himself: "I am an alcoholic: what should I do?", Then this is the first step towards correction and normal life. This is the first victory over yourself, but meager. One desire is not enough.
The reasons
Should begin with clarifying the causes of the disease. Some people mistakenly believe that the cause of alcoholism is a wrong lifestyle, weak will and a bad example before the eyes. However, these are only auxiliary factors, the true problems are deeper.
Psychological premise
Most often, the psychological factor plays almost a major role when a man is taken for a glass. Some of the frequent psychological problems of alcoholics:
- own impotence in the fight against depressions;
- inability to cope with stress;
- inability to eliminate negative emotions.
These circumstantial factors are found in every person in life without exception. However, in such situations, people behave differently: some will escape with a glass of vodka, others even in the head will not flash the thought of alcohol.
Psychologists allocate such reasons that pushing out a person "make friends" with alcohol:
- hidden complexes;
- unstable psycho-emotional background;
- unresolved problems come from childhood.
Environment, emotional instability, external negative factors only affect the development of alcoholism.
Many believe that the cause of drunkenness is a banal boredom. Fully rejected this assumption and can not be agreed. Indeed, it happens. However, the boredom is a deeper problem: an understanding of its cloth, loneliness, uselessness. When a person cannot decide on the main occupation of his life, it is lost gradually its own significance and self-esteem. Soothing he finds in a glass.
Psychologists believe that the most effective way in the fight against alcohol addiction is a competent organization of its lifestyle and leisure. Than saturated life, the less chances to get up on a destructive path called "I - Alcoholic". "What should I do?" - Answer this question will try further.
Healthy factor
For a long time, doctors have established that the fight against alcohol addiction needs to be started with the consideration of the heredity factor. The origins of alcoholism are laid at the genetic level. However, even in this case, with alcohol addiction can be said.
Often, the alkoprosphere develops in young adolescents with a faded psyche. At their age, the view of others plays a huge role. Here is a lot of wine television and not only advertisements of alcoholic beverages. According to statistics, it was noted: as soon as active advertising of alcohol appeared, the growth of implementation increased. Frequent buyers - young people.
Parents and relatives should be protected from the sad development of events. It is important to provide warmth, support and understanding in the family. And if the authority of parents for a young alcoholic is weak, then the chance to be in a bad company, in which with alcohol on "you", increases at times.
Bed with alcohol does not come alone. It is preceded by many factors. If a child with a diaper does not care for morality, morality, ethics, healthy lifestyle, then such a trouble will come to your home. If your child has such a terrible problem, the treatment of a narcologist and a psychologist is simply necessary.
Stressful situations
The suffered strongest stress is one of the main reasons for the development of alcoholism. Psychologists separately allocated such major stress factors that pushing the person to stand on this terrible way:
- betrayal of loved ones;
- bankruptcy, finance loss;
- loss of hope and goals in life;
- the death of a loved one.
Without the support of loved ones in such a difficult time for a person, it is not necessary to drown out. Many find the necessary support in alcohol and gradually drink. To return a person in a normal life, he needs a strong motivation. Without the help from the side in this case can not do.
What features is alcoholism determined?
- A pronounced desire to drink a "strong" drink: a person begins to be nervous if the house does not find alcohol. Even temporary abstinence from use can cause strong irritation.
- Loss of self-control: A small dose of "tidy" in a typical alcoholic does not cause Euphoria. Each day the dose of "cherished" used ethanol increases.
- A vomit reflex is lost: a healthy body is in vomiting or nausea. If there are no such natural reflexes in humans, it should be alert. In this case, you can safely talk about addiction and dependence at the physiological level.
- Long hangover: almost an alcoholic does not come out of this state. There is a habit of "shaving." It becomes the norm of tremor, the lubrication of the joints, muscle weakness and severe migraine.
The abstinal syndrome is expressed in the breakdown, similar to the narcotic. Such syndrome occurs if the alcoholic does not accept the usual dose of alcohol. Against the background of such a dangerous state, human health deteriorates, namely:
- cardiovascular diseases are developing;
- brain work is disturbed;
- there is a problem in the functioning of the central nervous system;
- the liver cirrhosis develops.
If there is an alcoholic, what to do in this case? Let's talk about this further.
Female alcoholism
Female alcoholism is different from male. It develops faster than male. According to statistics, on 100 men alcoholics account for 50 women who have alcohol addiction. In a short period of time, a woman has mental degradation and internal organs are rapidly destroyed.
The women in young and middle age are most often exposed to this dependence. Moreover, there is often socially successful women alone. Main reasons:
- treason of a loved one;
- violence;
- loss of a loved one;
- emotional breakdown;
- combining career and family construction.
Alcohol addiction can develop not only in successful women, but also in housewives. So they are trying to dispel a boring lifestyle, filled with life, unclaimed, unrealization in life.
In modern society, women's alcoholism refer more negatively than to male. Alcoholics men are treated, but from turn away.
Diagnosis "Female Alcoholism" Narcologist is based on anamnesis, survey and tests for the content of alcohol in physiological fluids.
If a woman is an alcoholic, what to do? First of all refer to the narcologist. The optimal treatment option is a continuous rehabilitation in a special clinic.
Aggressive alcoholic: What to do?
If a woman lives with an aggressive alcoholic, their relationship resemble a fight without rules. A woman voluntarily agrees to be a member of this fight. Often, such a fight justifies the used comparison. Often the conflict with an aggressive alcoholic end with the use of physical strength. As you understand, the bill is not in favor of a woman.
Often, the wives do not leave the aggressive husbands of alcoholics, because they depend on them financially. They have fear of independent independent life. As a fee for finance - rudeness, cruelty, ridicule, humiliation, violence.
In the Alcoholic House: What to do if there is nowhere to go? The husband came drunk and aggressive. The action plan is:
- Ignore insults from his side.
- Answer his questions calmly and try to send a dialogue into a peaceful direction.
- Switch attention to it yourself. For example, pay attention to its dirty clothes: "You're all dirty until it reached. Remove things, I quickly post. "
- You can suggest drinking him yet. So make many women to guess time and leave the house.
- Shock therapy. Obulation of cold water drunk man, a woman will win some time to quickly leave the house.
To avoid a scandal with possible consequences, follow the rules "not":
- do not humiliate alcoholic;
- do not buy his alcohol yourself or do not let me on it;
- do not take alcohol, interfering with it to drink;
- do not show your weakness and fear.
Remember that your personal safety is above all. Do not allow an aggressive alcoholic to manipulate you. The destruction of your life, living with an alcoholic, in which case will be slow, but confident.
Staying to live with an alcoholic under one roof - it means to constantly walk along the knife's edge. If the husband is an alcoholic, what to do a woman? Psychologists immediately allocate a number of problems faced by his wife:
Each time, seeing her husband drunk, and if he is also aggressive, raises his hand, then the woman gradually comes up with a place of revenge in the head. Well, if she chooses the option "leave." Does it happen that in a rush of anger can kill him?
If an alcoholic in the family, what to do? Often, psychologists involve the possible consequences on this question, having heard that a woman finds a way out of a difficult situation.
- Children who live with an alcoholic father, have serious problems of an intimate character. Often they associate their lives with the same as their father: with alcoholics or drug addicts.
- Alcoholic children have understated self-esteem and constant depression.
- In the soul of children, the volcano of restrained aggression accumulates. They have an inner emptiness, loss, doomed, unnecessariness, because they do not receive due attention from their parents. Mother struggles with an alcoholic father for his treatment, and his father himself is not at all on his children.
Why have the examples of problems with children? For each mother, it is important that their children are healthy both physically and psychologically.
The most faithful solution is to leave the husband and alcoholic forever, without returning. Stay and still wait a little - not an option. What to wait? While he did not turn his wife or children in cripples? If the husband is an alcoholic, what to do? Woman tips not stand around. A woman must come to the decision - to leave or stay.
How to cope with alcohol addiction? Methods
Optimal option: Complex therapy, which includes drug treatment and psychological assistance.
The treatment of alcohol addiction is carried out only if the patient completely refuses to eat alcohol. Not less than 12 days should not drink alcohol before the start of therapy.
Possible ways to combat addiction:
- Independent refusal.
- Without a patient's knowledge. When a person is dependent on alcohol, he gradually destroys the psyche. The patient is unable to take an obvious problem. Then loved ones are resorted to various methods of treatment, including people.
- Forced treatment, they are resorted to the chronic stage of the disease, when a person cannot solve their own problem with alcohol. Need professional long-term therapy in a narcological dispensary.
Most often, close relatives are resorted to the last method of treatment, who have a soul breaks for an alcoholic.
Medicia treatment
Immediately doctors prepare the body of the patient for receiving the designated drugs. Such manipulations are carried out:
- a dropper is put;
- antidepressants are prescribed to mitigate the abstinence;
- in case of manifestation of cancellation syndrome - neuroleptics;
- preparations for cleaning the body from alcohol residues.
Neuroleptics are prescribed as a last resort.
Psychotherapeutic treatment
Addiction to alcohol - including a psychological problem. Four effective methods of psychotherapeutic treatment are distinguished:
- hypnosis;
- emotional-cognitive therapy (control over their own emotions);
- erickson therapy (a session with a psychotherapist, on which the patient himself comes to answer his question: "I am an alcoholic, what should I do?".
The society of anonymous alcoholics is a worldwide organization that helps millions of alcoholics to get rid of dependence at any stage of the disease.
Group classes imply emotional support for each other and other methods of psychological therapy.
Coding
If an alcoholic does not want to be treated, what to do? Many women fraudulently drive their man to coding. The drug coding is considered the safest. The psychological type of coding (hypnosis) causes contradictions from doctors. In this case, the risk of an unexpected physiological effect increases.
In modern medicine, there is a laser at the moment this type of coding is considered the safest procedure for physical and psychological health of an alcoholic.
Be sure to treat the patient's dependence, you need to surround support and care. Throw all the "sleeps" and bottles with alcohol so that the alcohol is not broken.
As soon as a person wondered: "I am an alcoholic, what should I do?" You need to look for the cause of the disease. Get rid of the cause, and the desire to drink will disappear. Do not waste time in vain. Professional assistance in drug acquance will accelerate the treatment process.