The hour comes when the remains of the deceased are buried in the earth, where they will rest until the end of time and the general resurrection. But the love of the Mother of the Church for her child who has departed from this life does not dry out. On certain days, she makes prayers for the deceased and makes a bloodless sacrifice for his repose. Special days of commemoration are the third, ninth and fortieth (in this case, the day of death is considered the first). Commemoration on these days is sanctified by ancient church custom. It is consistent with the teaching of the Church about the state of the soul beyond the grave.

The third day

The commemoration of the deceased on the third day after death is performed in honor of the three-day resurrection of Jesus Christ and in the image of the Holy Trinity.

For the first two days, the soul of the deceased is still on earth, passing along with the Angel accompanying it through those places that attract it with memories of earthly joys and sorrows, evil and good deeds. The soul that loves the body sometimes wanders around the house in which the body is placed, and thus spends two days like a bird looking for a nest. A virtuous soul walks through those places in which it used to do the truth. On the third day, the Lord commands the soul to ascend to heaven to worship Him - the God of all. Therefore, the church commemoration of the soul that appeared before the face of the Just One is very timely.

Ninth day

The commemoration of the deceased on this day is in honor of the nine ranks of angels, who, as servants of the King of Heaven and representatives to Him for us, petition for pardon for the deceased.
After the third day, the soul, accompanied by an Angel, enters the heavenly abodes and contemplates their indescribable beauty. She remains in this state for six days. During this time, the soul forgets the sorrow that it felt while in the body and after leaving it. But if she is guilty of sins, then at the sight of the pleasure of the saints she begins to grieve and reproach herself: “Woe is me! How much I have become fussy in this world! I spent most of my life in carelessness and did not serve God as I should, so that I too would be worthy of this grace and glory. Alas for me, poor one!” On the ninth day, the Lord commands the Angels to again present the soul to Him for worship. The soul stands before the throne of the Most High with fear and trembling. But even at this time, the Holy Church again prays for the deceased, asking the merciful Judge to place the soul of her child with the saints.

Fortieth day

The forty-day period is very significant in the history and tradition of the Church as the time necessary for preparation and acceptance of the special Divine gift of the gracious help of the Heavenly Father. The Prophet Moses was honored to talk with God on Mount Sinai and receive the tablets of the law from Him only after a forty-day fast. The Israelites reached the promised land after forty years of wandering. Our Lord Jesus Christ Himself ascended into heaven on the fortieth day after His resurrection. Taking all this as a basis, the Church established commemoration on the fortieth day after death, so that the soul of the deceased would ascend the holy mountain of Heavenly Sinai, be rewarded with the sight of God, achieve the bliss promised to it and settle in the heavenly villages with the righteous.
After the second worship of the Lord, the Angels take the soul to hell, and it contemplates the cruel torment of unrepentant sinners. On the fortieth day, the soul ascends for the third time to worship God, and then its fate is decided - according to earthly affairs, it is assigned a place to stay until the Last Judgment. That is why church prayers and commemorations on this day are so timely. They atone for the sins of the deceased and ask for his soul to be placed in paradise with the saints.

Anniversary

The Church commemorates the deceased on the anniversary of their death. The basis for this establishment is obvious. It is known that the largest liturgical cycle is the annual circle, after which all the fixed holidays are repeated again. The anniversary of the death of a loved one is always marked with at least a heartfelt remembrance by loving family and friends. For an Orthodox believer, this is a birthday for a new, eternal life.

Days of commemoration: 9, 40 days and 1 year after death. All Souls Days and saints Orthodox. Parents' Saturday. Funeral service in Lent. Wake on the day of the funeral.

Days of remembrance of the dead among the Orthodox

Remembering a person who has passed away is a kind of mission, something obligatory, but at the same time performed without coercion - in memory of a loved one who is not around, but who remains forever in the hearts of people who remember him.

It is customary to remember the deceased on the day of the funeral, which according to Christian tradition are on the third day after death, on ninth And fortieth days, and also after a year after the loss.

Funerals on the 3rd and 9th day after death

Memorial Day after the funeral is very important. Those gathered to see off the deceased on his final journey offer prayers to God for the reassurance of his soul. On this day it is customary to cover large funeral table(you can find out what it should be like on the page “”) and have a leisurely meal, during which those present are given the opportunity to express their grief and say a few warm words about the departed person. How to issue an invitation to a wake - read the article. Read about how to formulate your thoughts at a wake and what words to choose on the “” page.


The wake on the ninth day is best held in a small circle- with family and friends, - reading prayers and resurrecting in memory episodes of the deceased’s life that characterize him from the best sides. On this day, you can visit the grave of the deceased, refresh the flowers and once again mentally “talk” and say goodbye to your loved one.

40 days and 1 year (anniversary)

Funeral for 40 days (or forties) are no less significant than the events held on the day of the funeral. According to Orthodox beliefs, on the forties the soul of a departed person appears before God and its fate is decided, where it will go - to heaven or hell. On this day, relatives and friends should prepare large funeral table and invite everyone who knew the deceased and would like to remember him. On the forties, it is customary to visit the grave of the deceased and read prayers for the repose of his soul.

Memorial service for the departed

Through one year after death it is not necessary to hold a wake for a large number of people, it is enough to gather together at the family table and honor the memory of the deceased person. At the same time, on the anniversary of death visit the grave of the deceased and, if necessary, restore order there. A year after the sad event experienced, you can plant flowers, pine needles on the grave, tint the fence, or, if the monument was temporary, replace it with a permanent granite or marble monument.

Do I need to go to church for a funeral?

Funerals for 3, 9, 40 days, as well as 1 year later they assume Orthodox Christians holding church services. When visiting the temple, relatives of the deceased light candles, read prayers and organize memorial services. But let's add that this can be taken care of not only on memorial days, but also on ordinary days. So, you can light a candle and pray in church if something is bothering you and feelings about the departed person come flooding back again. You can offer prayers in the temple on the birthday of the deceased, on the day on which his name day fell, and at any other time whenever you want it. You can perform prayers on memorial days at home yourself or by inviting a clergyman.

Why do we need to pray for the dead?

And finally. Remembrance days should be met and seen off in a good mood, without holding a grudge against anyone, especially against the deceased person. During the funeral, it is also customary to distribute alms to those in need and treat funeral dishes to everyone who surrounds you on this day - neighbors, colleagues, friends.

Commemorating the deceased is a kind of mission. This is necessary, but it is important that the person commemorates without coercion, of his own free will. They do this in memory of a loved one who is no longer around. But he forever remains in the hearts of people who remember him.

The 3rd, 9th and 40th days are especially emphasized in the conduct of memorial events, taking the day of death as the 1st day of counting. These days, the commemoration of the deceased is considered sanctified by church customs and corresponds to Christian teachings about the state of the soul beyond the threshold of death.

Funeral service on the 3rd day after death

The funeral takes place in memory of the miraculous resurrection of Jesus Christ on the third day and in honor of the image of the Holy Trinity. It is believed that for the first two days the soul remains on earth, is close to its relatives, visits places dear to it, accompanied by an Angel, and on the third day it ascends to heaven and appears before God.

Funeral for 9 days

The funeral on this day is held in honor of the nine angelic ranks, who can petition for pardon of the deceased. When a soul, accompanied by an Angel, enters heaven, it is shown the afterlife until the ninth day. And on the ninth day, with fear and trembling, the soul again appears before the Lord for worship. Prayers and remembrance on day 9 will help her pass this test with dignity.

Funeral for 40 days

On this day the soul ascends to worship the Lord for the third time. In the period from the ninth to the fortieth day, she recognizes the sins she has committed and goes through ordeals. Angels accompany the soul to Hell, where it can see the suffering and torment of unrepentant sinners.

On the fortieth day, her fate should be decided: in accordance with the spiritual state of the deceased and his earthly affairs. Prayers and remembrance on this day can atone for the sins of the deceased. The choice of the fortieth day for special commemoration was significantly influenced by the fact that Jesus Christ, after his resurrection, ascended to Heaven precisely on the fortieth day.

It is advisable to order a memorial service in the church on each of these memorial days.

Features of commemorating the dead:

1. You can invite everyone present at the funeral to the wake on the third day. On this day, the funeral meal is traditionally held immediately after.
2. Friends and close relatives of the deceased are often invited to the wake on the ninth day.
3. On the fortieth day, everyone comes to remember the deceased. The funeral does not have to be held in the home of the deceased. The place is chosen by relatives at will.

Commemoration on the anniversary of death

The mourning date should be reported only to those people whom the family of the deceased wishes to see at the funeral. The closest people should come - relatives and friends of the deceased. On the anniversary of your death, it is advisable to go to the cemetery. After visiting the grave, all those present are invited to a memorial lunch.

Memorial days are held at the discretion of the family of the deceased. It is inappropriate to discuss the correct organization of a wake.

Do I need to go to church for a funeral?

Funerals for 3, 9, 40 days, as well as for a year after death Orthodox Christians involve holding church services. Coming to the temple, relatives and friends of the deceased light candles, organize memorial services and read prayers.

If you wish, you can do all this not only on memorial days, but also on ordinary days. You can visit church, light a candle and pray if feelings about the deceased come over you. You can also visit the temple and pray on the birthday of the deceased .

If on memorial days it is not possible to go to church, then you can pray at home.

On memorial days you need to be in a good mood. Don't hold a grudge against anyone, especially the dead. These days, it is customary to treat funeral dishes to the people around you - colleagues, neighbors, friends. And also give alms.

Memorial days after the funeral (video)

There is such a tradition: commemorate of a deceased person on the third, ninth and fortieth days after death. These days who goes at the cemetery Yes, he distributes candy and baked goods among the neighbors “for the kingdom of heaven,” who organizes feasts, and who visits the church to light a candle for the repose or even order a funeral service. Why exactly these days, has anyone wondered? Not many people who. It’s how it is here: everyone says what’s necessary, so we do it. But I’m still in favor of doing it once, consciously, with understanding.

How to count memorial days?

First of all, memorial days need to be counted correctly. Otherwise, it turns out to be some kind of confusion: some remember on the third day, others after three days, and some even count from the funeral. I'll tell you how to do it correctly: wake days They count not from the next day after death, but from the same day. That is, the day of death is included. Well, for example, if a person died on the 5th, we consider 3 days - fifth, sixth, seventh - that means the seventh is the third day. Also, from the day of death both 9 and 40 days.

Meaning3, 9, 40 daysin Orthodoxy

In Orthodox sources, namely in the Apostolic Rules, there are instructions to perform thirds, nines and forties for the deceased - that is, to remember the dead on these very three days. And their meaning is described as follows:

The clergy say this: there is no more just court than the Court of the Lord, therefore, before appearing before it, everyone has a chance to say goodbye to their worldly life and find out what Heaven and Hell are. These days are allotted to the soul so that we can rethink our life, understand whether it was worth doing the actions that we did, and what is in store after death for our worldly pleasures. But it’s true, it’s fair.

But to be honest, the Bible barely describes the afterlife. And what is said in the Apostolic Canons is neither evidence nor refutation in Scripture itself. There are many interpretations as to why 3, 9 and 40 days , but nothing specific is said...

And you know what else? It turns out that traditionremember the deadon those same three memorial days, its roots go back to the times when Christianity was not accepted in Rus'. Maybe this is the answer?.. But I will tell you about this in my next publication.

Recently, on our portal, we have increasingly begun to read about memorial traditions, and articles about the commemoration on the 40th day have already been read by more than one hundred thousand people, so we could not ignore the memorial rites and beliefs of the ninth day of the commemoration, especially all these dates and traditions are quite strongly interconnected.

Why are funerals held for 9 days?

Accordingly, it was these dates that gradually passed from the pagan rites of remembrance, called “funeral funerals,” into the Christian tradition without much change, and many people have already forgotten what exactly they meant and mean.

Although, naturally, this day also has its own religious, and not just calendar, justification. It is believed that the memorial feast of the ninth day should be dedicated to the nine “ranks of angels,” that is, angels who, in turn, should ask God for mercy and leniency over a sinful soul.

What does the soul of the deceased do on the ninth day?

The fact is that on the third day (the day of the funeral), the soul of the deceased must go to the angels, who will take it to heaven and show it the heavenly beauty of the afterlife. And they show it all 6 days, until the most important 9th day comes. The day when the soul appears before the Almighty, accompanied by angels. And to give her confidence and make it as easy as possible to go through this process, a wake is held.

It is further believed that from the 9th to the fortieth day the soul must wander through “ordeals” (various obstacles in the form of sins, through which the soul must pass, accompanied by two angels, where a person’s good deeds must outweigh the evil ones) and then, having passed all the tests, the soul appears again before God, already for the final “verdict”.

Funeral ritual for the 9th day (nine)

Christians most often reduce this memorial rite to 9 days, which is sometimes called "nine" to a funeral dinner in honor of the deceased. And most often, everyone is not invited to the nine days of commemoration, but only the closest friends and relatives are present.

Naturally, this is not just a dinner, but a whole ritual, the purpose of which is to gather people who knew the deceased and remember his good deeds, thereby paying tribute and helping to accompany his immortal soul to another world with these “good memories” and their prayers.

Also on the ninth day, you can visit the grave of the deceased again, put things in order, tidy up, straighten the flowers, and say goodbye, releasing and even possibly “directing” his soul to God.

Sometimes on the ninth day they distribute various treats and alms in a cemetery or in a church, asking that the deceased be remembered for this. In fact, earlier funerals as treats were held mainly for the poor, and not for one’s family or simply to feed hungry relatives.

After all, the prayer of people who need food and who are very close to God is worth a lot. And if relatives just come to your house for dinner, eat and go home, then this, on the contrary, will not mean at all that they remembered the deceased.

By the way, the church, on the contrary, believes that the richer the food on the funeral table, the more it distracts those gathered from the necessary thoughts, so it is better to make funeral meals not from incredible delicacies, but from simple food, which precisely gives the appropriate “needed mood.”

And the money saved can be given away in charity. And naturally, the fact that you invited everyone, spent a lot of money, cooked food all day, also cannot replace prayers and kind words.

Should I go to church on the 9th day after death?

Therefore, at the wake on the ninth day from the day of death, you can go to church to pray. The most powerful prayer on all memorial days is considered to be prayer in observance of church sacraments. That is, ideally you should confess and receive communion before praying for the deceased.

It is difficult to imagine a more powerful prayer, because after reconciliation with God and the remission of our personal sins, we become closer to God than ever. It is believed that this kind of prayer can help the soul the most and bring it maximum joy.

You can also order a church memorial service or light candles and pray yourself, sometimes they just do it at home with their family or even invite a priest to the house.

How to conduct a wake on the ninth day

Well, the most important thing is that, as on all memorial days, on the ninth day you should not be sad, suffer and be in a depressed state of mind.

Moreover, grief and sadness are one of the mortal sins and a complete denial of the Christian faith, because the soul of the deceased is sent to a “better world” and must be taken on its “last journey” with a pure heart, good mood and a smile. At a minimum, so that the soul of the deceased itself does not suffer due to the fact that close and beloved people suffer because of it.

It is natural to rejoice too much and hold all sorts of unusual entertainment events, fairs and competitions on this occasion, or get drunk, as the pagan Slavs did in their rituals. According to representatives of Christianity and the church, it is also not worth it, but grief is also inappropriate.

Funeral mood, clothing and good deeds

Here it is rather necessary to maintain a golden mean, showing at the same time respect for the soul, letting it go in peace, and not starting lavish parties for yourself. After all, the main point of a wake for 9 days, and for any other date, is not a party with drinking and gluttony, but a prayerful remembrance.

Moreover, many priests believe that in honor of this day, it is better for relatives to abstain from any sin for at least 40 days. Do it, as they say. A good deed for the benefit of the soul of the one walking, for example, stop drinking or smoking and the like. Then such an act can be counted as prayer.

Better yet, even stop watching TV, because it will definitely distract you from the desired prayerful mood. And also, do not wear too lush, bright and beautiful outfits, which will also take you out of this “correct state” of spiritual connection with the deceased.

It is also natural that at a wake you cannot remember the deceased with “unflattering words”; moreover, according to the ritual at the funeral table, you should not even begin to communicate on abstract and everyday topics. After all, this day is dedicated to seeing off the soul of this person, and you should not be distracted by various “worldly discussions”, forgetting about the most important thing, about why everyone has gathered.